Is it stingy that my friend charged me for her groceries?

Question

I drove from Detroit to visit my friend (and her boyfriend) in Cleveland this weekend.

Yesterday morning, we were going to have brunch at a restaurant that serves bottomless mimosas (and brunch) for $30 a person. We called the restaurant and found out it's illegal for establishments to serve that much alcohol at one time in Ohio. Instead, my friend suggested she just buy groceries to make brunch instead, and we could make our own mimosas. For some reason, she grabbed six bottles of champagne for all of us. I told her since I was leaving that day, I would not be able to drink two bottles of champagne to myself, as that's an insane amount to drink within a few hours and then drive back home. She insisted that they would truly be "bottomless" then. Long story short, the grocery bill ended up being $81. She then asked if I would toss her $27 to pitch in for "my third". Honestly, as a supposed "guest", I was appalled. I never asked for any of the groceries she was buying, and I certainly wasn't going to drink all of that champagne. She makes over $100k a year, so it's not like she's struggling.

A few months ago, I held a big brunch at my my place that she and her BF came to, and it didn't even cross my MIND to charge them money for the food/drinks I bought. Not to mention, I also deep-cleaned her entire kitchen and bedroom of her apartment the night before.

Of course I paid her, but that stuck with me. How stingy can you be to charge your "guests" for food you offer to make?

? · Answer

That was extremely rude....you do not charge guests for food you buy when you invited them to come to your home.

Anonymous · Answer

You could have refused! you chose to give her the money, no use moaning now.

Pearl L · Answer

yes, and i wouldnt have paid her

Common Sense · Answer

This incident goes beyond stingy and boarders on using you.

Besides, the story about bottomless drinks in Ohio makes no sense as to why you did not go there.

Anyway, you were willing to pay $30 to go to the restaurant, not including a tip.  So, for $27 you got away with spending less than you intended to at the restaurant.  However, that does not negate the fact that you were charged for a bottle of champagne or more than you could possibly drink.  So, in that, you were used and taken advantage of.

In her defense, she probably was not going to pay for your brunch at the restaurant, so perhaps she felt she was not responsible to pay for the groceries because you all made the joint choice to cook and drink at home, which probably translated to her that you would share the cost.

Stingy?  No.  But, six bottles of booze is a bit much and I do believe she took advantage of you, nonetheless.

geegee · Answer

I think so.  But was the brunch at the restaurant going to be her treat?  Maybe she was thinking you'd pay for your own meal and this grocery thing is just an extension of that.  Hard to say without knowing how you've done things with her in the past.

y · Answer

She makes over $100k a year, means nothing, she can be in serious debt, over 75% of US households live paycheck to paycheck and the average debt being carried is over ten thou.
 Although it isn't something i would do i can see why one would go in that direction. Comparing what you did to what she did is truly bad form.

? · Answer

Yes it is, she is a cheapskate. When my closest friend comes over NEVER in my wildest dream would I ask for 1 penny. I go wild on my spending so does she when I go visit.
Low class. Plus that cheap sparkling she bought.

Anonymous · Answer

thats really bad of her!!! so rude and unclassy. i don't really get what the Q is but yeah it wasn't right of her and now you know to make her pay for her 'third' or '2/3 (if she comes with her bf)'

Anonymous · Answer

u bough 6 bottles of  CHAMPAGNE and paid only 81 dollars ? those were not champagne, whom are u kidding. those were cheap sparkling wine

sanity · Answer

Then take note to charge her, in future, for anything that should be charged.
If she has a problem with that, you will then know that it is better not to have such 'friends'.

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Is it stingy that my friend charged me for her groceries?

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