How to stop being antisocial??

Hi, so I've been pretty sure my whole life. But in the end, I always managed to make a friend or two in my classes..so I'm 7th grade year, I literally had one friend in my class, but she was always hanging around the popular kids in my class so I almost never got the chance to hang around her except in one period. In my class, I was known as being quiet and shy, which was something I hated but I never did anything about it at all.. In the beginning of the year, I did try to make some friends but it was hard for me to keep asking if I could join someone's group for a project so I just gave up.. Why bother. You know? I always hated when I had no one to talk to in class or no one to partner up with so I gained depression that year and every day that year I was reminded that I had no friends and that I wasn't good enough so I lost my confidence and became awkward.

So now I have to ask how do I stop being antisocial?

I'm not comfortable in social settings if my friends aren't there. I will NOT go anywhere at school if my friend doesn't come. I stay quiet for some reason and I know I can say something but for some reason I hold my tongue and don't say it. I feel like I'm being judged and I hate it. I wish it wasn't like this