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I need help figuring out what to do and how to approach my sons teacher.?
My son is 5 years old and in Kindergarten, he has many issues we are currently trying to figure out and learn how to handle. He is being evaluated at the moment, but my biggest concern is his issues with anxiety, he is a very fearful and anxious child. His teacher seems very understanding of his issues when we meet, but no matter how many times I have mentioned that he does not handle any amount of criticism well she continues to write a lot of critical comments on his papers, many of which seem very silly to me and wouldn't need correcting such as saying that his coloring isn't realistic because he chose to make the people in his picture blue. It has gotten to the point that at 5 he is hiding some of his papers and throwing them out before I can see them. I know she feels I need to know the places he is struggling in, but I feel like their must be a better way that wont continue to tear down my sons self esteem. Any ideas would be helpful, I just am not sure what else to do at this point.
I would like to point out to any who feel my son may not be ready for kindergarten, he is very smart as far as the academics, he reads and understands the information he is just not at the same emotional level as his peers which makes things difficult and in many ways his teacher seems very critical when it comes to his work.
Not a single sheet comes home without some kind of note at the top even when he has completed the sheet correctly, either his coloring is too sloppy or he uses the "wrong" color (he likes rainbows and often uses as many colors as he can), or his handwriting is an issue (which I know is a legitimate concern but she knows we are working on it and it seems counter productive to constantly reiterate it. Its got to the point that he no longer believes he can do things and he just gives up
Also his anxiety has been an issue for a long time now, he has always been a very fearful cautious child, but since starting school it has skyrocketed
5 Answers
- PRLv 73 years agoFavorite Answer
My son's teacher did that, too. She told him he couldn't color an elephant blue. I told him he could use his own color choice.
If she doesn't get it, ask for a change in classroom. I had to do this when my daughter's teacher continually lost her temper to the point her yelling could be heard in the hallway. When she broke the plastic handles of a pair of scissors on a desk, out of anger, I wrote the letter.
Have you met with the principal?
Keep all the papers, document all negative comments, compare to positive. Present this. Positive behaviors at this age should be reinforced, rather than negative.
Write down what you want to accomplish before meeting with the principal so he is clear on things.
But, wondering if the fear/anxiety existed before, or have accelerated? K should be a place where a child learns to like school, not hate it.
If you need to change teachers, do it and preserve the son's potential love of learning.
Find ways to praise your son at home.
Trust your son.
- SquidLv 73 years ago
If your son is 5yr old in Kindergarten and reading the teachers notes to you, you should be proud and bragging to all the other parents about his reading level. If you are the one reading the notes to him, maybe you should just stop doing that.
- MamawidsomLv 73 years ago
Honestly, my suggestion would be to withdraw your son from school and wait until you have a full diagnosis and your son has matured. It would appear that he is. not ready for kindergarten. Some kids just need more time. It won't matter when he is an adult, but it matters a whole lot now. Also, realize that your son won't be going on to 1st grade if he can't follow directions and meet minimal achievement levels. There is no point in keeping him in school. Consider putting him in a part-time pre-K program and getting him whatever therapy he needs once a diagnosis is made.
The teacher is not there to coddle and appease your son. She is there to teach him, assess is progress, and correct his mistakes. If he is unable to follow directions or handle the realities of a kindergarten classroom, he simply isn't ready for school yet. This is not about the teacher or her approach. This is about your son's current inability to be in kindergarten.
- Anonymous3 years ago
NO teacher should criticize a child for using “the wrong colors”, unless he had to fill in an assignment that says things like “color all “A” words blue.”
Welcome to the world of education. Some teachers are just garbage. Another issue here, is that not all 5 year olds are ready for Kinder (especially boys). It’s so late in the year to be complaining. These issues needed addressed much earlier. Maybe another classroom would be a better fit.
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- Anonymous3 years ago
Even anxious children need to learn how to cope with criticism, so you must keep that in mind. However, telling a child that he shouldn't color people blue is just pointless. Obviously he knows people aren't blue.
This whole post is a little odd, so I have to wonder whether you are a troll. If you are not, you might take your concerns to the principal, though it might be a good idea to wait until the evaluation is completed and you have professional support for those concerns. If the teacher still isn't responsive, you should see the principal.
