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Millenial father with 11 year old...my son is asking sensitive questions on race, climate change, media ownership, etc... what can I do?
as feared, he is using the internet to learn on many a subject matter; I believe I have a savante in the making, this kid has a very deductive mind and he's asking questions or either testing my answers, just the other day he asked about the accomplishments of each race, he asked me what Africans contributed, I went blank, then the other day he asked about Climate Change, siding with the theory that Climate Change is a natural earth cycle, then he showed me a video (below) that really got me concerned... How do I approach this? I have taught him to be very open minded, to accept all people and races, a very liberal upbringing he has, but I am at a loss on what to say or do when he asks and ponders upon such things. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVmiAR5nvJE
2 Answers
- 3 years ago
The best course of action would be to educate yourself so you can explain these issues to him, otherwise there are some very easy and very wrong explanations that some people are happy to belief (Such as "Africans are just Idiots"* or "Climate change is natural"**)
By giving him some basic education on internet safety, including that anyone can write, post or otherwise put anything on the internet and that you can thus not be sure that it is all-or even for the most part-correct, you can also make sure he's better equipped to handle the net.
If he seems to be getting into bad sites that may actually pose a danger to him, things like pro-anorexia sites, extremist sites or others that are very persistent in calling for violence against people, you might want to consider blocking them and (especially if it's pro-anorexia and such) speak with him about it.
I'd advise against blocking pornographic sites, however, if he's in that age already. It'll only increase the allure and might lead to him searching his thrills in more distant and dark corners of the internet rather than on relatively safe sites and belief me, some porn*** is much better than risking him getting into the dark web or similar places.
I'd also advise against banning anything and everything controversial, if he has no experience it'll be easier for him to fall into traps at a later time where he'll have less trust in you and you will have less power to stop him if he does run into trouble. Explain to him how he can stay safe, if he messes up several times (clicking on advertisements and such) maybe figure out some appropriate consequence (Diminished screentime, a media-free day or just a very thorough explanation why it's a bad idea to do what he did)
*The prevalence of infectious diseases carried by parasites such as mosquitoes prevented bigger civilisations-and thus technical innovation (to a pretty large degree)-from developing in Africa since early on they'd have to be on water sources to provide water and food for all inhabitants, but that was where the mosquitoes where as well. In smaller civilisations these diseases couldn't become epidemics (too few people) but would control the population. Most larger civilisations (or beginnings thereof) were wiped out by these diseases (malaria and such, you know the deal).
There were a few, though.
Then the Europeans came and exploited them and when they suddenly left they left no resources, but quite a power vacuum and if they left suddenly that lead to instability, corruption, dictatorships, civil wars, poverty, you name it.
the cheap prices on food farmed with machines on the international market also often prevents local farmers from selling theirs (as it'd be somewhat more expensive due to a lack of machinery) since the imports are that cheap and thus the farmers don't earn a lot of money, same thing with clothes and a lot of other products.
**Get the facts and explain them to them, (Keyword: Industrial revolution, that's when it started), tell them about how some change is normal but this rapid pace is not, about the rising seas, disrupted ocean streams, the problems for our health (Keyword: Ozone Warning, if you have that in America, and Smog) and the extreme weather situation's we're starting to get (It's ******* April, it was snowing 2 weeks ago and now it just was 30°C, and that's just the tip of the proverbial iceberg, hurricanes and such are increasing as well), the problems farmers face...
Try and get a good amount of sources to explain it to him, best jot down anything you've used to learn so he can go and follow your footsteps if he wants to.
***By some I mean amounts that don't seem like it's the only thing in his life, addiction and obsession are a whole other can of worms and can happen with many things. If it's only a little, let him have his porn.
- Anonymous3 years ago
First, you either need to limit or restrict what your son does online. He's getting into way too many online sites, most of which aren't appropriate for a child of that age. Or better yet, you need to take his phone and tablet away from him, until he's a lot older and more mature. The internet and social media are no place for a child his age. He needs to be getting his information from real BOOKS and from his TEACHERS, not from social media. And you have no idea who he's interacting with online. For all you know, he could be visiting adult chat rooms and talking to grown men with pedophile fantasies. NOT A safe place for a child to be. So take away the phone and the tablet till your son is older, and start closely watching what he does when he is online at home. The computer he uses should be used for nothing except school work. No Facebook, no Twitter, none of that. And KEEP IT OUT OF HIS BEDROOM, too.