is there an alternative explanation for my rape-trauma-like symptoms?

Only a doctor can adequately diagnose and treat your symptoms. Make an appointment to see a therapist as soon as possible. I'm not sure who these "psychs" are, but the last thing you should do is rely on friends for a diagnosis.

Of course, there are other posdibilities. You could have seen a sexually violent scene on tv when you were small, heard or overheard a story that scared you when you were little, or had something totally legitimate happen that freaked you out (such as a doctor inspecting you for an infection) when you were small. Your parents could have been overprotective and unwittingly taught you that men are dangerous and NEVER let one touch you. That your dad is sociopathic also could lead you to feel men can't be trusted. Chances are people have hit on you, but you read it as danger, and maybe you give off a vibe for men to stay away because of your fears. See a therapist. You can work through this, and you don't have to be with a guy, but it's important to feel safe and be able to handle a little affection.

No, sounds unlikely. What sort of 'psychs' are these? Are they qualified doctors?

check with doctor for more info

You can seek counseling, but do not go blaming anyone in your family for something that may never have happened. It solves nothing, and is a classic Casey Anthony move.

I don't know, maybe all women have some sort of fear of guys to some extent, and it's something that has to be broken through, you have to allow yourself to get to know a guy so you can start to trust him and feel comfortable. I assume at some point your urge to find love will overcome your fear of guys, if you're straight.