His new wife keeps texing on my ex husbands phone when I'm asking HIM not HER if he wants my son to come over.And she's answering for him.?

Do not text. Call. Or see in person.

Sadly in the case of divorced coparents the new partners do tend to get involved and the only people who can curtail that involvement are the divorced coparents themselves. So you could talk to your ex about this but it'll probably just cause an argument. As long as you're getting the information you need about your son I wouldn't worry about it. Yes, she's insecure but that who he chose to marry.

She's his wife now.. not you. He is obviously fine with her talking to you on his phone.

Who do you suppose is looking after your son while he's with his Dad? Who makes his food, provides fluids, cares for him? Could be his Dad, of course.. but very often it is the stepmother. Might be good to communicate with her.

First, you say “when I was married I never touched his phone or controlled who he can talk to”- well obviously this new girl is a little more smart than you are on this topic. After all, what did letting him talk to whatever girls he wants, get you? It got him to cheat and divorce you. Now he’s with another chick. This new girl doesn’t want the same fate, so she’s gonna make sure he only talks to her. It’s called protecting what’s hers.

I know you’re not gonna like to hear this, but the fact is, he’s married to someone else now so you no longer have the right to talk to him if he or she doesn’t want you to.

You might wanna talk to him, but if they decide you can only talk to the wife, then that’s how it is. He isn’t “your” man. He’s HERS now. And you shouldn’t try to use the kid to get inbetween their marriage. It won’t work and you’ll just look foolish

It's no good telling us, you should be telling him all of this.