Advice Needed With Girl I Like At Work?

Question

The Situation i need advice with is below:

Started working this job about 3 months ago, instantly attracted to this girl.

Every time i would smile at her she would either ignore me or smile briefly then immediately look down at the floor.

Eventually i spoke to her by the water cooler briefly and she was lovely and sweet,the next day i said hello several times and she acknowledged me for the first time without ignoring me.

Then i had a week off came back expecting things to progress from where we left off the following week however she went straight back to ignoring me.

HOWEVER this is why i am so CONFUSED:

I catch her staring and looking at me all the time i am doing the same thing to her sometimes it is subtle other times it is very obvious and i catch her and she snaps her head away.

WHY does she ignore me and to be honest with you basically avoid me when i catch her staring and looking back at me all the time?

To be honest i couldn't take it anymore so i made myself look a fool and messaged her on insta liked a pic and followed her also added her on FACEBOOK of course she hasn't responded. Yet the following day after doing this again she looks over at me throughout the day.

After all that my question is i know for sure she likes me now because of the way she looks at me and acts around me i really like her to be honest so i want to keep perusing her i just want to know should I?

Also any ideas Why she is acting this way, if shes not interested why keep looking.

Brandon C · Accepted Answer

I think your overthinking this a little bit.  It sounds like she may like you, staring doesn't necessarily mean much.  Neither does smiling ETC.  Some people just do this naturally.  In any event, it doesn't sound to me like she is interested.  If she was she would have responded to you on social media, and so on.  It is possible she doesn't want to get involved with you because you are a coworker, or maybe she has had bad experiences with dating, either way she isn't ready or doesn't want it.  Let it go.

Funnelweb · Answer

She is looking at you to make sure you aren't staring at her.

You have already committed sexual harassment in the workplace. You cannot safely ask a female co-worker out these days because if she isn't interested in you then it's an "unwelcome invitation to go out on a date" and (in my country at least) it meets the legal definition of "sexual harassment".

Fortunately only the most bitter and ardent feminists would actually prosecute a man for a single polite invitation. Many women don't really want to get a guy into trouble for a single invitation. But it is a legal possibility.

However a persistent show of interest is a different matter. That could certainly get you in trouble. You have already gone way too far, but she knows that you are interested. If she was interested back she would be replying to you by now.

You need to seek people outside the workplace for sexual or romantic partners.

steph · Answer

I’m having the exact same thing with a guy at work only he’s doing this to me. I just cut my losses deleted him off social media and just came to terms with the fact he either doesn’t like me and it was all in my head or he doesn’t want to cross the co worker dating line. I am now keeping convo to a min and acting like I would go anyone else I don’t even look at him anymore believe me you will get over her there’s no point perusing someone who wants to play games with you your adults these childish games are no good for anyone you need a more mature person

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Advice Needed With Girl I Like At Work?

3 Answers