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Is he too scared to commit to a relationship?

This guy and I used to message each other every day, it was 50/50 who messaged first and he opened up to me about how he has issues getting close to people and is more reserved now because of a past relationship and losing a close family member last year. We got on so well then out of the blue he messaged me ‘I’m not really thinking about anything at the moment, things change’ I seen him out at the weekend and he started opening up to me again, said he doesn’t feel like he can commit to a relationship with any girl and that the problem lies with  him. He said it’s gonna take a lot for someone to make him want to commit. We made out and things got quite heated... he’s really family oriented doesn’t strike me as the type who’s just out for sex, he said he hasn’t been brought up that way. People that know him think he’s putting on a front trying to act tough so he doesn’t get hurt again when really he wants to be with someone and someone to comfort him. I just don’t know what to do now?? we’ve been talking quite a bit again but I don’t want to push him away from me, he opens up to me about personal stuff then he’ll disappear for a bit then come back again. Am I wasting my time here or should I keep trying? I really don’t know what to do, we have such a good connection at times when he doesn’t shut me out

2 Answers

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  • Anonymous
    1 year ago
    Favorite Answer

    So, like many girls, you seem to only want to see the positive things about this guy and ignore the negatives. Here's the way things will probably go. The two of you will do this dysfunctional dance and the intimacy between you will increase until you end up having sex. He will get what he wants and you won't. All that you are going to get is a broken heart when his actions don't back up his words. Just saying he wasn't brought up that way doesn't prove anything. I'm sure he wasn't brought up to treat a girl the way he has been treating you. How does it feel being in a relationship where the guy acts like he can take it or leave it? If he isn't ready to commit to a relationship, he shouldn't be in one! I think you should walk away from this and find a guy that really wants you and isn't afraid to show you that he does. All this situation is doing is damaging your self-esteem whether you realize it or not.

  • ?
    Lv 6
    1 year ago

    Do you want a relationship? If yes tell him!

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