Is there something wrong with me?

I work with women who have C-PTSD; PTSD, BPD, BD and other concerns.  I am not a feminist but work for women's advocacy.  I do not know where you are, do not need to know.  They are ignored or pushed away with problems....But women are treated differently (worse) especially here in the USA but everywhere.  Sterotypes, sexism, social expectations & shamed/degraded.  The last two the worst?  Rather than being told be loud & proud, be comfortable and confident or be you.  Women are told they are too sensitive, exaggerating, shouldn't feel that way, it could be worse.  Not because I pity them.  Women are stronger than men often.  Its good to help when someone can.

Some months.....  So this goes on for months at a time and has been for a long time?  "Emotional Dysfunction", "Emotional Intensity" are you hypersensitive to external stimuli (of any kind)?  Touch, Sex, Emotion, Hate, Love, Sound or people in general?  Things might fit if you have noticed hypersensitivity.  I am not sure what you mean.  But "suffering" is older than the bible, christ & first accounts of Egyptians.  Its the most powerful thing we know of (pain) but for love/sex.  I just don't know what you meant when you talked about it.  I think you might understand not dealing with it, letting it out/experiencing it is toxic.  It is probably one of the worst things we know of. It builds an internal pressure too....

 fully opened up on reddit and felt better after that i watched fight club and felt different and for the first time i acknowledged my pain but soon a week or 2 later i crashed hard.

--- That sounds a little trollish.  So, I am going to ignore that.

Telling parents, others often leads to problems.  Possibly you noticed.  People invalidate, ignore, laugh, assume you are an attention wh*re or label you more - they assume you are just crazy.  If you don't do anything of course it gets worse.  It does not magically go away.

Typically, there is something going on right.  Whether its BPD, C-PTSD, Gifted/Empath or more.  While you might think the last two are foolish with the vague information you gave, that is a general guess.   It is impossible hard to answer questions without history, background, details and specifics.  There is 19 yrs of life you hardly touched on.  But, that is a general guess.

If you were here, I'd wonder these things and about their history (How, when/why:)  I am not really asking for answers.  But...  All YES OMG (or all 'sort' of) ....  Most yes with good examples.Are there perceived (felt patterns) of people using/exploiting you?

-- Do you seem to give everything and people give nothing back?

Do women seem to isolate(push away) or treat you "sharper"(anger/bitter)

-- Do you seem to wind up with wrong men too often (social/other)Do you have a unique/individual style (clothes, body, hair - makeup?)  Something other than the "hot model" or typical girl?

-- Does look change?

Are you more artsy and creative, have more interest in that then math/science stuff?

You interested in things others might consider different, strange or "taboo"?

Generally do people socially seem they could treat you better?

Do you have chronic issues with negative intrusive thoughts?

Forgetting about general insecurity/self-esteem with the right man, people/person could you be very confident/not ashamed?

You stubborn?  Can you manipulate if really needed?

Do you get lonely but don't want to be around people?Do you get mad/angry or snappy frequently (perceive a bit too much)?Are you a troll?

Are you good at telling how other people feel/reading their emotion?

Is it a more chronic (constant) depressed/"blah" or icky feeling..  Rather than a happy for a few hours, excited for a few more then horny.  Meaning more not raging depressed but an empty feeling than rapidly changing emotions hour by hour.Could you love harder than anyone you know, do you think you do?

Are you spontaneous or enjoy doing things because they make you feel good/live in the moment.  OR can you perceive yourself being this way if you felt better or were with the right people?

Do you do little/big things because you care about your look or how you are perceived (either or) rather than wake up saying fu*k it I don't care?Do people tell you are too sensitive or generally misunderstand you too much?

Do you ever feel pressure changes in rooms?Distressed, frustrated, tired, exhausted, worthless & concerned.  Do you relate?Does sex/masturbation change how you feel, release pressure or benefit your mood quite a bit?Do you often blame yourself for everything?  "I am dumb, worthless, broken, bad" without really thinking about was it their fault/out of my control?You know when bad news is going to come, not always but kind of know/sense it?

A little different take: Feel like if you cant get rid of agitation/anxiety you will explode I told you what it vaguely sounds like.  I have no idea.  Your question was too vague.  If you get bored and just want to email (only): Listenforyou@protonmail.com

This my friend is known as the start of a greater depression, i suggest talking to your school health advisor to try get you some therapy for free if your in the usa or outside uk if not, talk to parents and tell them you'd like to see therapist to talk about this as they can help you before it is too late.