I don’t want him but I want him to want me.?

Alas, my friend - this has nothing to do with him.  It has everything to do with what YOU think of YOURSELF.  THAT is going to require quite a bit of effort to change.  Are you up for that?

Here's an example to think upon:  You want him to want you, even though you know you're not interested in him in that way.  Why?  Because you want EVERYONE to want you.  (Everyone who meets or exceeds certain criteria).  Why?  Because you're not sure you're want-able.  You fear you might not be.  You're pretty sure lots of other guys/girls are MORE want-able than you are, and the competitive part of you trembles at that.  In fact you're starting to consider that you might NOT be all that want-able, at all!  (Which is why you're suddenly concerned about being perceived as a toxic bi tch - when that's never bothered you much, before.)

'Sokay.  Lots of us face problems like this.  None of us are perfect and a lot of us would like to change things about ourselves that distress us.  It's possible to do.

The key to it is to aim at one day being comfortable with the thought that you'll enjoy life just fine, even if NOBODY finds you want-able, or even notices you're around.  That's where you want to be...not in that social situation, necessarily - but mentally self-reliant and calm enough that winding up in that situation wouldn't phase you at all.  That's a great source of strength.  I recommend you go for it.

maybe you shouldnt be with him then

Imagine that if you keep leading him on you’ll owe him pity sex. 

Plus focus on who you really do want.

maybe you should break up with him