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Is my mother wrong for saying she can only visit 30 minutes for Xmas dinner?
I invited my mother a few weeks ago to come to my apartment for an Xmas dinner - I told her it would need to be before Xmas so around the 21st and she said yes she would come - and then said why did I spend the Christmas before last year at dinner with a close family friends family instead of her and her boyfriend (who sexually harassed me and tried to bribe me but that’s another story) when she had never invited me in the first place.
Anyway my mother is currently not working and sits in the car with her controlling boyfriend whilst he couriers deliveries to random locations in the city - but she never does any of the work other than sitting in the car and helping to lift things. Anyway I live alone and had made a big pre order Xmas food delivery of lots of nice Xmas foods I thought we could enjoy together, as well as decorating my new apartment really nice and buying a big table and chairs so we could sit and eat.
I told her yesterday if it would be okay for her to come on Monday afternoon as that’s the day the food will be delivered (in the morning) and she said no she will be working (by that she means sitting in her husbands old van which she loves doing because she is obsessed with him even though he gets drunk and hits her and had a record for gang rape) and I told her but you said you would be able to get the day off? She said no she couldn’t, but she can come at 8pm at night and stay for 25 minu
then leave, after I would have spent all day cooking for her?
Updated 7 mins ago:
I told her what day can you come, and she said on Friday, Christmas Eve.
I don’t know if all that Christmas food will fit in my rather small freezer - and as I’m on a tight budget atm as my job aren’t paying me until after Christmas I don’t think - I am scared that I may end up eating the food in those days if I run out of money or food as that Xmas delivery. And if I where to cancel the food delivery and
2 Answers
- Gummy RoachLv 74 months ago
This is one of many reasons why I'm not a big fan of the Christmas holiday; the stress and obligation it tends to place on people. That's something I could do without.
Anyway, if I read your question correctly, it looks like you invited her for Christmas dinner and she accepted. Now she's saying she can only stay for 30 minutes? That's unfortunate. Do you have other family members or a friend you could invite instead? Otherwise, I guess you could store what food would fit in your fridge and freezer, etc, but then see if you can give what doesn't fit away. Put it in disposable containers and maybe give some of it to your neighbors or something.
- Anonymous4 months ago
🥴 My dear... give up on your mother. She's no longer your mother. She's her husbands wife.
When ppl get married, they become 1 unit and move as 1 unit.
She cant do anything without his say so. And obviously he said no.
🥴 If I were you, Id cut ties.
You deserve better.
🥴 Where I come from and how I was raised is you never let inlaws take over your immediate family. Well... I held true to what I was taught. But my nasty aunt chose her pervert husband over her own blood. 🥴😒 This is the kind of shxt that happens when ppl get married. Water is always thicker than blood.
