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Is my friend naivee for being very forgiving?
She's older than me (34), has been married for 6 years and has 2 (teen sons) kids.
It's been already 8 years since she fully forgave both her now MIL and SIL. They used to treat her terrible, gossip about her to others while smiling in her face and tried to break them up twice. One day they both regretted what they did, asked for forgiveness and according to her, never went back to their old ways. Over time, a connection got reestablished (stronger than ever) and by now she considers them her 2nd family. She adores them now.
She has forgiven and befriended a couple former school bullies too. She gets along and likes them too. I asked why because it seems silly to me to actually forgive and forget those who were horrible... then to actually like them, wow.
She explains that their apologies were followed by actions and that as long as the wrongdoer learns, never does it again and continues being a better person not just to her but others, that's enough apology and no further apology nor groveling is needed is by then. She believes in 2nd chances if they learned and really mean it. Is she still veing very naive?
Also she said if the person is sorry, makes no excuses and is making efforts, changing for the better then it's stupid holding grudges. She doesn't like holding grudges because it poisons you and makes you no better than them.
