Lady Prism

This is a little long, but please read. :)

My father, age 64, suddenly started having trouble urinating. He needs to go every 20 minutes or less, and it's quite painful when he does.

He went to a urologist, and they took blood and urine samples. They ended up proceeding to a CT scan... and this is where it gets questionable...

Just before the scan, they put my Dad in a hospital gown and said the doctor would be in shortly. He waited for almost 2 hours (and remember- he has to urinate every 20 minutes!), and when the doctor finally came in he says "Sorry I'm late... long lunch." So then during the CT scan, they looked at his kidneys. The doctor noticed a small blockage like a kidney stone (there is a family history of stones) and said (exact words) "Wow... you're gonna have fun passing that one!" So my Dad asked if they could blast it with sonar technology, and the doctor replied "Let's just worry about one thing at a time." They CT scanned his bladder, and found strange growths.

They scheduled my Dad for an optical scan (with a camera inserted through the penis into the bladder). They gave my father no medication for pain (ie no local anesthetic, IV sedation... nothing) before or during the procedure. Once in the bladder, there were obvious growths (10 of them!) that were bleeding. The doctor, once again, made light and said (again, exact words) "Wow... you're screwed. That's malignant cancer, alright!"

After the procedure was done, of course, my Father had questions... the most pressing being "How do you know it's cancer?" The doctor's response was "Well, because they're bleeding and because of the location." None of my Dad's other questions were answered, but the doctor proceeded to tell him that he was retiring in August, needed to finish up with all his patients, and was looking forward to a nice vacation... "So how does surgery in 7 days sound? And then we'll need to get you started on Chemo..."

Now, this doctor never did a biopsy. Is cancer in the bladder all that common? Or could it be benign... or just ulcers? Is there a way to tell without a biopsy?

Anyways, my Dad is pretty upset (as am I!) about the comments and not getting any questions answered. He feels pressured to just do as he's told, even though none of this sits right with him. I told him that he really needs to get a second opinion, but he is concerned that the doctor will get mad and deliberately hurt him if he ends up having to use this doctor for his surgery (insurance HMO... not a lot of options).

Also, none of his options were explained to him (treatments, surgery, aftercare, chemo treatments if it is cancer). Is it just me or does it sound like this guy just wants to squeeze a couple more dollars before he retires? I feel like my Dad has the right for adequate health care and to TRUST the person treating him... he also has the right to refuse treatment if he so wishes and take his chances.

Has anybody been through anything similar with doctors, and gotten (or not gotten) better treatment as a result? And specifically, can a doctor just diagnose cancer without doing a tissue sample? Granted, there is obviously a problem, but is it normal for a doctor to jump to a conclusion, treat it without verifying, and just be outright rude about the whole thing? Also, I have had many friends/family members who have fought cancer... so I thought that they had to be healed from surgery before starting Chemo. This doctor wants to do the surgery on the 20th, and start Chemo by August 1st. Would my Father be healthy enough to start Chemo that soon?!

Any advice or words of encouragement for my Dad (and me) would be greatly appreciated! :)

I was curious... many parents feel that spanking is tantamount to abuse.

So how do you feel about soap in the mouth (for lying, cussing, etc)?

From personal experiences in my own childhood, I remember the soap as being MUCH more traumatizing than any spanking I received.

PS- This question isn't meant to be judgmental as to right or wrong... just an honest curiosity. :)

My daughter will be 5 in June and she's really getting good at reading. Spelling, however, is more of a challenge...

We moved to Chicago from Denver about a year and a half ago. Since moving here, it has been pointed out to me that I have some strange accent! LOL Unfortunately, my daughter was speaking in full sentences from the time we moved, and caught part of that Western-ish accent. However, having lived here for a while, she has started to pick up that weird Great Lakes type accent, too, and they've blended together to form some crazy language altogether!

So now that she's learning to spell, I'm noticing some problems:

Words like "butter" and "button"... I say them as "budder" and "buht'uhn" (if that makes sense? Hahaha). So my daughter tries to spell them as such... "b-u-d-d-e-r", etc. Also, tree... she hears and spells it as "C-h-r-e-e".

Then there's words from the Northern side... like Bag. I say BAG, she says BEG. She tries to spell "bag" as "b-a-y-g". And "backpack". She almost says it as "byack-pyack"... again, the spelling! And don't even get me started on "about"! LOL

She does do a great job spelling things as she hears them- almost too good (chree). She's great with the phonics. But I guess my question is, does anyone have experience with this? Is it something she will just have to learn and practice (obviously we're still working on spelling), will she outgrow it? Will she just learn to work her way around the accents? Or should I look into some type of speech therapy or special help in regards to reading?

I do not wish to write a paper about all the details and symptoms, so I'll just summarize, then ask my question.

Over the last 5 years, I have had symptoms of EXTREME fatigue, joint pain, canker sores, mild hair loss, etc. I am also anemic (which no amount of iron or B vitamins changes in the slightest). In this time, I have also had a false positive Syphilis test, and chronic kidney stones (3 in 7 years).

In August of 08, I developed a cough that STILL has not gone away. I have been to TONS of doctors and been diagnosed with pneumonia, asthma, bronchitis, allergies, etc, and put on more antibiotics than I care to think of... all the antibiotic treatments actually made me feel worse.

I also developed a sudden, strange rash on my leg after being out in the sun for a couple days... which also has not gone away. And more recently, I have a light butterfly rash on my face.

Last month, I finally found a doctor that said "Wow... 8 of the 11 symptoms of Lupus... let's get you tested." I was x-rayed to check for Pleurisy (in the lung tissue), and put through about 10 blood tests (also checking for lyme disease, just in case).

Even after the false positive Syphilis, and the anemia, I tested negative on the ANA test. Kind of. I tested higher than normal, but apparently too low to make a full diagnosis of Lupus.

What does this mean exactly? Is there such a thing as borderline Lupus? And I know there are a few other diseases that mimic Lupus... but what are they? I know that Fibromyalgia is one of the "mimic" diseases, but would that also account for the blood disorders that I DO have and the rashes?

I do have another appointment with my doctor in a couple weeks, and I also know that making a Lupus diagnosis can sometimes take a while... but has anyone had the negative ANA issue and still been diagnosed with SLE? And what was your experience... anything I should ask my doctor to look for on the next visit?

Thanks!

Obviously, Queen hasn't been Queen since Freddie Mercury died, but Brian May has done a beautiful job of continuing their legacy.

He's done a lot of touring since 1991, filling in and rearranging the band for various venues. I know that this year, Queen and Paul Rogers is playing in England at least twice, but they haven't done a North American tour since 1993, I believe.

Now here's my question:

My 4 year old daughter is OBSESSED with Queen- she knows all of their albums by heart. LOL After bawling her eyes out when I told her Freddie passed in '91, she asked if they're going to be in the US any time soon?

Also, I would like to know if they still play Queen's hits at concerts, or do they stick to Brian May's new compositions?

(And yes, I know concerts are not the ideal place for kids, but I am a professional musician and my daughter has grown up with similar venues from the time she was born- usually with Mommy on stage. Please don't lecture me how not appropriate this may or may not be.)

Anyways, thanks in advance for all your help! :)

So I love amaretto... it's sweet, mixes well with a lot of other drinks, is great by itself, smooth... but I have a huge problem!

I am deathly allergic to apricot! Amaretto is an almond liqueur, but usually processed with apricot or peach pits (or has an apricot base), as well as other fruits.

I was wondering if anyone knew of a brand of Amaretto that is made exclusively from almonds, processed with almond pits, etc.? Or a brand that is fruit free?

Also, do you have any suggestions for good mixed drinks that are fruit free? Berry free too... I have 150+ food allergies! :(

Thanks!

Are there any clarinet players who have tried the Cannonball Clarinets?

I'm a pro doubler, and I have played on the Cannonball Bari and I am IN LOVE!

I assume that the level of craftsmanship is comparable, but what do you think of the tone and playability?

So I have always done almost all of the mechanical maintenance myself on every car I've owned. I have rebuilt 2 engines ('89 Toyota Corolla and '90(?)Ford F150), including transmission, brakes, etc.

I now have a '96 Geo Metro (3 cylander- yes I'm aware that it's a glorified lawn mower! lol). I know that in most Metros, the exhaust system wears out around 100,000 miles... I have 106,000 miles, and guess what?! I NEED A NEW CATALYTIC CONVERTER! Haha...

I haven't done a lot of work on my Metro (I don't have a garage to work in anymore), and the average price I have been quoted for parts and labor is around $1000 (though I have been quoted as high as $2500!). The part only costs about $120+/-, so is there THAT much in labor that needs to be done?!

I guess my question is: even though I don't have experience with the Geo, would it be too hard to replace the catalytic converter myself? And does anybody have any good resources to refer me to that tell me how to do it?

Thanks!

My 3 year old daughter and I play this rhyming game... we name something around the house and try to find words that rhyme...

And for some things, we come up with short phrases- like we have a ferret, so we rhymed it with "share it"...

But what the heck rhymes with WINDOW? LOL

We try to find real words, and slang doesn't count (like Joe Schmoe wouldn't work...). The closer the word, the better, and try to keep it clean!

Thanks!

This is an odd question...

I am a professional musician, and have played clarinet for 18 years, and bari sax for 15. Over the years I have tried other instruments (flute, oboe, bass, guitar, piano... the list goes on), and have been quite successful! I can play most instruments proficiently (at at least a college level), but have never really tried brass- until about 6 months ago.

I have a trumpet, and have been playing long tones, scales, etc. I sit and play along with Miles Davis and Louis Armstrong (by ear), and have been catching on fairly quickly.

Here's my problem: I have trouble playing anything below a middle line "G". I can get to a low "C" if I change my embochure, but I think that's bad technique, right? And I certainly can't play anything below that, let alone fluidly! My high range is great (I think) for a beginner- I can play up to a high Eb (3 ledger lines above the staff) and can keep it in tune.

Any tips on improving my lower range?

Thanks!

This is an odd question...

I am a professional musician, and have played clarinet for 18 years, and bari sax for 15. Over the years I have tried other instruments (flute, oboe, bass, guitar, piano... the list goes on), and have been quite successful! I can play most instruments proficiently (at at least a college level), but have never really tried brass- until about 6 months ago.

I have a trumpet, and have been playing long tones, scales, etc. I sit and play along with Miles Davis and Louis Armstrong (by ear), and have been catching on fairly quickly.

Here's my problem: I have trouble playing anything below a middle line "G". I can get to a low "C" if I change my embochure, but I think that's bad technique, right? And I certainly can't play anything below that, let alone fluidly! My high range is great (I think) for a beginner- I can play up to a high Eb (3 ledger lines above the staff) and can keep it in tune.

Any tips on improving my lower range?

Thanks!