malisa

I haven't dated for almost 4yrs now coz am scared of getting hurt & that means i haven't had sex with a guy for almost 4yrs now.There's nothing wrong with my physical beauty or inner beauty. Am very beautiful & a very good person,i've been told a lot & know it myself.Use to be a model & actress,not like international modeling or actress but i did get by & enjoyed it.Am now 35 & got a 19yr daughter but still looks drop dead gorgeous i've been told. Am very confident about my physical appearance but really afraid of getting hurt or falling in love.I finally decided to give this guy that liked me a chance to date me,he's good looking & my type of man but he backed off & stood me up!! He said am too beautiful for him to be mine!!! I was shocked! He choosed a less attractive girl,am sure she's beautiful on the inside coz i hate calling ppl ugly,i really hate that coz beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Am not angry that he choosed her over me,am hurt that he felt i was too beautiful to be his gal,am hurt that he doesn't see my inner beauty & just my physical beauty. He's very insecure about his physical appearance but i don't see nothing wrong with the way he looks coz i find him very handsome & i liked him & still do,i told him all that. I cried 3 days straight cuz i couldn't believe he didn't want me coz he felt i was too beautiful to be his. Made me totally confuse & i just don't know what men want any more. Am still hurt & still cry a lot cuz i just wanna give up on men totally. Just stay single till i die cuz there's nothing i can do about how beautiful God made me in & out. If men can't see pass my physical beauty,then i think it's best i stay single for the rest of my life. I've done it for 4yrs,what's more yrs to come? right? Am independent,got a job,renting my own flat,content with my life,i just do get lonely occasionally which is normal for every singles but sometimes it's so hard,like now. I crave for a man's touch & comfort so badly at times. I really don't know what to do any more. Am feeling so nakedly fragile emotionally these days & very scared that i might be taken advantage of,i feel like a prey for a lot of bad men out there.Am not stupid to fall for bad guy but am just so weak right now. I wish he could come back & say he's sorry but that's too late now.Will i ever meet a man who will love all of me? or am i doomed to spend the rest of my life alone?

I haven't dated for almost 4yrs now coz am scared of getting hurt & that means i haven't had sex with a guy for almost 4yrs now.There's nothing wrong with my physical beauty or inner beauty. Am very beautiful & a very good person,i've been told a lot & know it myself.Use to be a model & actress,not like international modeling or actress but i did get by & enjoyed it.Am now 35 & got a 19yr daughter but still looks drop dead gorgeous i've been told. Am very confident about my physical appearance but really afraid of getting hurt or falling in love.I finally decided to give this guy that liked me a chance to date me,he's good looking & my type of man but he backed off & stood me up!! He said am too beautiful for him to be mine!!! I was shocked! He choosed a less attractive girl,am sure she's beautiful on the inside coz i hate calling ppl ugly,i really hate that coz beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder. Am not angry that he choosed her over me,am hurt that he felt i was too beautiful to be his gal,am hurt that he doesn't see my inner beauty & just my physical beauty. He's very insecure about his physical appearance but i don't see nothing wrong with the way he looks coz i find him very handsome & i liked him & still do,i told him all that. I cried 3 days straight cuz i couldn't believe he didn't want me coz he felt i was too beautiful to be his. Made me totally confuse & i just don't know what men want any more. Am still hurt & still cry a lot cuz i just wanna give up on men totally. Just stay single till i die cuz there's nothing i can do about how beautiful God made me in & out. If men can't see pass my physical beauty,then i think it's best i stay single for the rest of my life. I've done it for 4yrs,what's more yrs to come? right? Am independent,got a job,renting my own flat,content with my life,i just do get lonely occasionally which is normal for every singles but sometimes it's so hard,like now. I crave for a man's touch & comfort so badly at times. I really don't know what to do any more. Am feeling so nakedly fragile emotionally these days & very scared that i might be taken advantage of,i feel like a prey for a lot of bad men out there.Am not stupid to fall for bad guy but am just so weak right now. I wish he could come back & say he's sorry but that's too late now.Will i ever meet a man who will love all of me? or am i doomed to spend the rest of my life alone?

Not that i don't like sex but i only get horny once every two months or so.

Please don't tell me to watch porn coz there's really no connection there,we all know it's fake & can be actually boring most of the time.

Am talking about a single girl just getting horny on her own more often,not once every two months if she's lucky.

I really wish i was addicted to sex & can get orgasm at all times.

Please don't tell me that i need professional help.

This is not a joke,am serious,men're so addicted to sex than women,men wants it all the time & they always *** but women don't often,it's so not fair.

Please answer this respectfully.

Thanks

How accurate are scientist about human evolution? How so very sure they are about what they're talking about? Where're the evidence? ? ? Should we just believe what they say? Am totally lost.....

could i be suicidal & not know that i am?

i love life,love my job,love my family,got friends but not ones i can actually talk to.

i will never dream of taking my life cuz i know how painful that would be for people meaning friends & family but then,if they truly love me, (why am i here asking you guys?)

because they're not really there for me,every one goes on living their lives & i can't blame them cuz that's how life works,right?

gosh! i really miss having a friend i can really talk to......

am feeling super alone,sad & depress right now.

am on meds for panic attacks & so on,the meds works really good & trust me, am not suicidal (but why i keep hoping to die because am so alone?)

why does friends & family say the word (we're here for you & love you when they really aren't?)

they're too busy living their own lives to really care,when you kill your self,they get all sad & pity & say,why she didn't talk to us? yes you do try your possible best to talk to them but they're always too busy to listen sadly,before they know it,you're long gone..............

am i suicidal?

I was once in a car accident & that's not just why am afraid of driving,i have long had that fear before the accident.

I wasn't the one driving cuz i don't know how to drive,am really deeply afraid to get behind a wheel of a car.

Please help me.

I get so lonely,sad & depress.I have never got to have a real childhood & teenage life.Am not free to live alone but am working on getting that freedom very soon.I have not seen my family & friends for 11yrs.One of my dearest friend i got lucky to make here killed himself about a month ago leaving behind his newborn & girlfriend.Am helping to look after them both.Yet i don't have any one i can call a friend or a best friend.It's not easy if you're living in a strange country trying to make a living to help your family back home.Am very beautiful list i have been told & known.I have been a model,i have been a movie extra in some famous movie here.I have a very good heart,am kind & loving.Am the type that when i walk in a room full of folks,i'll light up the place with love & kindness but yet i find it hard to make friends and why? Cuz i don't really have anyone to hang out with socially.My only friend that i always spend the new year & socialize with killed himself.Am 34yrs old but when you see me,i look like am 22 or 23.I work with babies now cuz i love them so mush.I don't do drugs,not ever committed any crimes than been a victim of WAR.15yrs of WAR,endured all the war crimes that was committed against me & so many innocent