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Joel K-B

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Who, What or Where I am is none of your business, And I'm here to kick ass and drink cups of tea. And i'm all out of tea. - Souls I Own Laura Ray Martin C (came without conscience)

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  • Help for a dysfunctional family?

    I'm a 16-year old boy and I have just started my summer term, which will last two months. As I usually go to a boarding school, I miss all the usual goings on, but now i'm back i'm not sure if I can make it to september while staying sane. I have a 13 year old sister, a 53-year old mother and a 59-year old father, and we all have problems:

    My sister is very rude and obnoxious. She suffers from typical teenage girl symptoms, like throwing a tantrum whenever she does not get her way, however she is also very deceitful and is addicted to anything sweet, to the point where I would assume that she is going to get diabetes (and her figure shows it, too). This has a negative effect on her temper; for example, recently she has started to be rude to our 86-year old nan, who tells me she is really worried and that she has no self-confidence anyway (my nan, that is).

    My Father split up with my Mother when I was eight, from what I gather it was about his drinking problem and his habit of getting us into debt. nowadays he has a job at a language school, and he is constantly doing overtime, that is when he's not drinking. My dad is a good guy, but he has no time for us as his life is dominated by work and booze. My dad thinks that he doesn't get drunk because he's never had the common stereotypical symptoms of it, however dad tends to get really tired instead, and he doesn't seem to notice. The only time he's around is when me or mum complain enough for him to avert himself from the pub.

    Finally there's Mum. she works as a "Higher Level Teaching Assistant", which is basically a teacher but with different classes and less pay. she lives a hectic lifestyle: when she gets back around 4 she gets on with a load of chores, then gets a phone call from my nan, trying to get mum to give her some company. by the time that's done she prepares tea. The main problem with mum, which is probably not helped by this, is that she is too soft. If my sister does something wrong, she issues threats but never carries them out. When she wants something done she doesn't demand it, but asks feebly, and offers little resistance if refused.

    Now, I'll admit I'm not without my flaws: I'm very lazy, I get little done, I don't do any chores unless asked, I usually don't bin my food wrappers, etc., but I can see what tension builds up when and I don't know what to do about it.

    If anybody can give me any help with what I can do to help, even if it's minor detail, please do so so our family can be a family and not an anarchy.

    Thank You.

    8 AnswersFamily1 decade ago