JC-Mad Dog

Bella and Edward smokes a joint together. Edward gets the munchies. The end.

PS. If you report this you're nothing more than a sour puss with no sense of humor...at all.

This really happened this morning as I was driving home (worked night shift) on the N4 between Pelindaba and Quagga Toll Plaza. A cyclist indicated to me that he needed help, so I stopped. He told me that he was shot at and robbed by 3 idiots, 2 of them armed with hand guns. I knew that the only thing I could do for him was to call the SAPS, but I didn't have airtime, so the guy said it's ok, he'll continue. I drove on to Quagga Plaza thinking I would try and get the toll booth operators to at least inform SAPS, this is how my conversation with the idiot went:

Me; Hi, do you have direct contact with the SAPS?

Him; Yes, why?

Me; A cyclist was shot at and robbed about 11km back by 3 men, 2 were armed.

Him; Oh, but it's illegal to cycle on a national road, this often happens. There is a sign that says cycling is not allowed.

Me; So, since he is cycling "illegally" it's ok to shoot at him and rob him?

Him; Mmm...yes.

I sped off to prevent myself from moering him halfway to hospital.

So, what would you guys have done?

it ran under the axe while I was chopping wood...

will I be sent to jail for murder? Or man...errr...dog slaughter?

Can I call the funeral parlor with my one phone call I'm entitled to?

OR do you think a good vet will be able to put its head back on?

WHAT ARE MY OPTIONS HERE?

which do you prefer;

a) petting your own monkey?

b) taking it up the smelly freckle?

Winnie the Pooh was based on psychological problems. Winnie has an eating disorder. Piglet suffers from anxiety.Eeyore has major depression. Tigger has ADHD.Rabbit has OCD. & Christopher Robin must be a drug addict if his stuffed animals talk to him.

Do you agree with me about this?

I know 'gans' is a goose, but I mean in this particular context what does it mean?

I know about it because it's in our history, but I'd like to know how many of you know about it.

It was during the 2nd Anglo - Boer war that raged from 1899 to 1902.

The British put the women and children in concentration camps since they were the Boers' logistical supply line.

PS. I'm South African

When will you rate the question re: Mamba vs King cobra?