Twisty

My husband and I fight terribly and it just gets worse and worse. We have lived together for 15 years and have 2 boys aged 14 and 11. I have horrible depression and get PMS, but he just flings that back in my face and is never sympathetic when I'm feeling low. He goes mad at me over stupid little things, such as forgetting to switch the dishwasher off when it's finished, or forgetting to ask how one of his parents got on at their hospital appointment. I do visit my GP and take appropriate medication and supplements, but my main problem is I don't sleep very well, and tiredness makes things worse. I don't know whether we are just so incompatible that we shouldn't live together, but when I haven't seen him for a day or so I miss him. We haven't had any type of counselling together either, as he has always refused. I would love to hear from anyone who has been in a similar situation.

this is our time (or town?), got off the ground, taken what's mine, and we're not going down. It's a track played in my body combat class and I need to find it!!! Thanking you in advance :)

a woman singing, the only words I can remember are "sounds of freedom" which she says a few times. it's quite orchestral, and I thought it might be from a Pirates film. Sorry I can't think of any other way to describe it, hopefully someone will know what I mean!

When I go into any game on my Wii, the hand from the controller is pointing downwards, then if you try and play the game, it doesn't recognise the controller at all. I have tried changing the priorities of the controllers, and have also checked the sensitivity of the sensor. Also, obviously, the batteries don't need replacing. Any ideas?

I work shifts and have trouble sleeping. I want to try Nembutal/phenobarbital, but I can only find websites overseas, and they ask for a prescription or fee upfront. Does anyone know where i can get it?

1. I wish I worked longer hours

2. No, I don't want more money

3. My bum is far too small

4. I'd never sleep with George Clooney, he's minging

I can't think of any more at the moment, can you?

I have to be careful what I say here. I can't think of anybody more irritating. He seems to think he's funny, and what's with the size of his turban/hair wrap? (sorry, I don't know what it's called). I saw a programme with him and John Torode this morning about Indian food, and he was so incredibly patronising. He also did my head in on the f-word the week before last.If anybody does find him funny, can you please explain why? I apologise if I've spelt his name wrong, i'm sure you know who I mean.

With the Southwest chipotle sauce. Does anyone know where you can get a similar sauce? I can't seem to find one anywhere. I love lettuce, red onion and black olives on my sandwich, in hearty Italian bread. What's your favourite?

I have a Sony Ericson k850i and I have tried to download pics from the gallery on my pc, but it doesn't give me the option. Also,do I need a memory card for my phone? I'm not good with WAP either, as I tried that way on my old Motorola. I normally ask my nephews for help, but they're a bit busy this weekend. Any help would be greatly appreciated, thanks!

Always ignore a ringing phone/doorbell. Let someone else answer it.

Make sure you spend your days off work doing something useful, such as playing on a games console for at least 4 hours.

If you do any household chores, only do one thing at a time, and be sure to mention it regularly to your partner over the next couple of days.

When doing the laundry, only wash one load per day, and only ever iron your own things. Also, don't bother using the dirty washing basket, the bedroom floor is just as good.

Always leave smelly trainers or football boots just inside the front door. isn't it hilarious when someone trips over them?

Don't bother trying to stand on the bath mat when you've had a shower, especially if you have laminate on the bathroom floor.

Don't offer to finish work early to take the kids to football practice-that's their mother's job

Follow these rules, and your partner will put up with you (after all you pay the bills & take the rubbish out)

Do the opposite & she'll love you!

Actually, that's an insult to birds. This is a genuine conversation between myself and a customer in the cafe where I work earlier today.

customer: I'd like a children's sandwich snack pack please

me: yes, and what kind would you like

c: the children's snack pack

m: yes, but would you like jam, ham, chicken or cheese in the sandwich

c: I want the one that comes in the box, you know, the snack pack

m: yes, but which sandwich would you like in it?

c: oh, what kinds do you have?

m: jam, ham, dairylea cheese or chicken

c: oh?

yes, you'll be pleased to know the child eventually got a sandwich pack. More worrying for me was the fact that this woman has reproduced, not once but twice. I won't even tell you about the trouble we had selecting a jar of baby food for her younger child. I could obviously give many examples of bird brain behaviour amongst my customers, especially when it comes to the coffee machine. Does anyone have a more deserving contender for the title?

It's the music they use to introduce the judges on the X factor and it also used to be on the Old Spice adverts. It doesn't have any words in it, I hope someone knows what I mean. I would like this track for a kids football presentation at the end of this month, just in case you're wondering why I'm asking a strange question. thanks!

...is it the woman who plays Bradley's mum in Eastenders? Also I noticed some sad website complaining about the brantano ad, saying that it patronises women by implying that they have a mental illness regarding shoes!!! LMAO! The ad clearly pokes fun at itself! Who the feck dreamed up a site complaining about adverts? Ha ha!

I have never stopped all weekend. I don't want to bore you with the details, but I have bust a gut doing the housework, sorting school uniforms/PE kits, my husband's work shirts, plus the cooking and dishes. I dared to sit down for 30 mins earlier this evening, and my husband was annoyed that there was still stuff to be done, including helping my son with his maths homework (which I'm no good at). I'm still rushing round now, after midnight, making sure that everything is ready for the morning, because if it's not, it's me who gets the blame, not my husband. I also work 5 days a week, about 30 hours. Why do men get away with it? He has been asleep on the beanbag on the sitting room floor for most of the weekend.

I often get PMS (not every month), but the last 4 days it has been the worst ever. I take a high dose of evening primrose oil every morning and vitamin B complex. Yesterday and today I've had to use Rescue Remedy because I'm so tense and aggressive, I apply lavender gel to my temples and I took 2 Kalms about 30 minutes ago. I feel like I can't tolerate anybody or anything and I end up crying. I will be very grateful for any remedies, website addresses, or support in general. Thanks :)

What will you do to celebrate? Terry Wogan has just revealed this gem of information on Jonathan Ross.

She says "I want 2 butterflies, one on each bum cheek, but I've only got £20". The tattooist says "I'll do the outline for £20, but you can come back tomorrow with the other 20 and I'll finish it off". The woman agrees, but is disappointed when she looks in the mirror. "Oh" she says, "they look more like bees".

She goes home to find her boyfriend waiting in the flat. "I've got a surprise for you!" she says, and bends over provocatively, removing her jeans and her pants. Her boyfriend looks up, and yells in horror......

Following on from my question about silly words the other day to which I got a fantastic 76 answers, it turned out that my favourite word, Snodgrass, was in fact a surname. Now I need to know about silly names that you have come across. They must be genuine though! My mum met Ophelia Bott, and someone I know called their daughter Iona McIntosh, but my all-time favourite is Henrietta Twatt (as in Henry ate her...) I hope I don't offend anyone here, so I apologise in advance, but hey, we all need a laugh!

What word always makes you smile if you hear it? Mine is snodgrass, and no, I don't know where I got it from. It's one of my son's nicknames.

I LOVED Beth Ditto's make-up on Jonathan Ross on Friday, especially her eye shadow. Does anyone know what brand of make-up she wears, or who does her make-up? I really want her eye shadow!!! Please help!