Kami

This is has been going on since 6th grade when I was bullied a lot and I guess it made me isolate myself from people and everything. I m a freshmen in high school now. I don t have many friends because its hard for me to make them. I can t talk to people. I don t like going outside. I can t order my own food. I can t even do things in front of people without sweating or shaking. I barely even talk at all, and i eat lunch in the bathroom because I don t like eating in front of people in the cafeteria and its way too many people. I m always alone and I don t want to be. I really wanna make friends and be normal but I physically CANNOT make myself talk without feeling like crying or throwing up because i m nervous about every little thing. I wanna talk to my parents about it but they probably won t even understand it and they ll say i m just "shy" even though its hard for me to even leave the house. People already think i m weird because I never talk. I just wanna be normal and not have to be scared of everything :((

I think this is my biggest problem. I'm in high school now. I have no interests. I don't like much. I don't go outside. I can't talk to people, i'm always anxious. I suck at everything and i honestly don't know what I wanna do after I graduate. Everybody around me is good at SOMETHING. I'm just here for no reason, with no purpose.

Well, I know its not okay but its weird. I'm 14 and just started my freshmen year of high school and it sucks. But lunch is the only thing I look forward to because I can eat without feeling like I'm being watched. Its quiet and I can finally relax without being so anxious about something. I hate the cafeteria because I don't have any friends and it's really hard for me to talk to people. So I used to sit alone and pretend like I'm texting people on my phone. Seeing everybody else with friends and people to laugh with makes me feel worse. I've been eating lunch in the bathroom since 8th grade :/ I hate my anxiety and I know I'm not helping my situation by avoiding it. I can't help it. I wanna talk to my parents about it but they already think something is wrong with me and so do my teachers. I don't know what to do and I also don't want the rest of high school to be like this. Middle school was just like this and I don't want a repeat of it either.

What do people see in them? The stuff they do isn't cute or funny its just annoying and a waste of time. For example, the girls at my school likes this boy because he always picks on other people like....how is watching somebody humiliate another person for no reason cute? He's good looking but that personality makes him so ugly to me. I don't understand why people like that are so popular its stupid.

Okay so I just started high school and I guess you can say I've prepared myself for a year of loneliness and hiding out in the bathroom during lunch all just to avoid people. I don't know why I just.. freeze up around a lot of people. I can't talk. I can't ask for things. Mostly people just think something is wrong with me. That's what my parents always say. They always force me to over my cousins' houses and go to parties and stuff and they always say " dOn'T wOrRY jUsT bE nOrMaL fOr oNcE aNd hAvE fUn." but you know what? I don't have fun. I'm awkward and I can't hold conversations even if my life depended on it. I just can't force myself to speak or be "normal" I guess. Its probably obvious by now that I don't have many friends. So I make up people in my head. I pretend that they like me for me. It passes time but its not gonna work forever. I hate being so scared of anything even my teachers think they're is something wrong with me. They've talked to my parents so apparently, I'm getting a therapist or something. I feel like I'm the only person like this seriously

Its so frustrating like honestly, my boobs have been the size of grapes ever since I started developing them in THIRD grade. They haven't grown AT ALL. I'm 14 now and In high school and I have no idea why the won't grow. I don't wanna stay a flat chested little boy forever :/

It started a week or two ago then it stopped. It came back today while I was in class. It sounds kind of like a heartbeat or something but I know its not that. It doesn't hurt its just annoying

I'm 14 and a freshmen I just started school two weeks ago. Ever since 6th grade i've been bullied alot and haven't had friends ever since. I get super nervous around tons of people and get all choked up. At this point I just avoid everything that has to do with people. I don't eat lunch at school I hide in the bathroom. I can't work in groups. When people ask me questions I get sweaty and my legs start shaking and I can't talk. I hate it so much. My parents call me a "coward" for being scared of everything. They're right but I can't help it. I can't make friends so I'm literally the only one without one actual friend. I go all day without speaking. I created this alternate version of myself in my head so I just daydream all day but it honestly just makes me feel worse. I want to tell my parents but they'll just say i'm being weird or something but I think I actually need help!! I Physically can't make myself talk to people and its holding me back. I've even tried to kill myself last year because being alone and the bullying got to me. I tried to slit my wrists and overdose. I ended up throwing up the pills and I couldn't cut deep enough. Nobody knows what I tried to do that day. I'm thinking about trying it again because I'm so tired of being alone,.

Okay so I was walking home and I have to cross this street and for some reason crossing that street always makes me super nervous I just hate crossing streets. Anyways I get there and I wait for all the cars stop weLL I THOUGHT all of them stopped and this car came out of nowhere so I just jumped back onto the sidewalk but this lady in her car stopped and told me to cross and thats what actually did. It was a **** ton of cars passing and I was really just running through traffic like the dumbass I am. I almost got hit so many times and people were honking and yelling at me. I really wanted to cry beacuse idk what the **** I was doing :c it really took everything in me not to cry all the way home. My legs were shaking really bad and I couldn't breathe I was just speed walking and hyperventilating the rest of the way to my complex.Everytime I think about it I tear up and I feel like I can't breathe.

I hate mine so much. I feel like people stare at it and i've tried eating more but I dont gain weight its so weird

This might be a little long but I feel so alone right now. I'm 13 and in 8th grade I go to high school in a few months..I barely have any friends and I'm really antisocial. I have one friend her name is Melanie but she puts me down a lot and people always like to be around her she's really outgoing and people find her funny and cool to be around i've been living in her shadow since7th grade. When she doesn't come to school I barely use my voice people always ask me where she is they never ask me how i'm doing or start a regular conversation. People tend to pick on me a lot they find me odd because I don't talk to anyone I just keep to myself. I self harm and stuggle with my apprearance a lot I cry myself to sleep most nights. My parents think I'm a failure and a liar. I'm starting to think that too. I've tried to kill myself last year a couple of weeks before Christmas but I couldn't cut deep enough and it hurt too much so I just sat there and cried until I couldn''t cry anymore. I hate living in other people's shadows. I hate being made fun of for not doing anything but minding my own buisness. I hate not having something special about me. I hate being useless. I hate living. Sometimes I wonder if I even belong in this world. I feel so out of place everywhere I go. I have no friends I'm always lonely. Am I the only who feels out of place 100 percent of the time? I need people to relate to.