Dee13

Ok so I posted before but I feel like I didn't describe the situation well enough. here it goes...my fiance and I have been trying to decide where to have our wedding. We didn't want anything big to save money because it's very tight right now so we were looking at small, intimate places. However, my uncle owns a big catering facility. It's huge and beautiful...so my family suggested I inquire about having a bigger wedding there. A little background info...he is my dad's brother as well as my godfather...my mom and dad are divorced. My mom and stepfather basically raised me but my dad and I get along...sometimes. His business does very well. He makes more money in a week than I do in a whole year!! So, my fiance, mother, and I went to see about having it at my uncle's place and the price is outrageous. It is a very nice place, but the price is very high. He said he was giving me a discount because I'm family, but it's still steep. The discount is about 17%. I would get a lot for my money, but it's expensive for us. He kind of assumed we were going to have it there and told us to call him with our date selection, but here are my questions:

- How do I tell him it's too expensive without being rude?

- What do you think of the discount?

- Am I going to sound like I want more of a discount if I say it's out of our means?

- What kind of discount would you give a family member?

- I haven't talked to my father yet...what do I tell him?

Any advice would truly be appreciated. Thank you so much!

So, my fiance and I have been trying to decide where to have our wedding. We didn't want anything big to save money so we were looking at small, intimate places. However, my uncle owns a big catering facility. It's huge and it's beautiful...so my family suggested I inquire about having a bigger wedding there. He is my dad's brother...my mom and dad are divorced. My mom and stepfather basically raised me but my dad and I get along...sometimes. So, my fiance, mother, and I went to see about having it at my uncle's place and the price is outrageous. It is a very nice place, but the price is so high. He said he was giving me a discount because I'm family, but it's still steep. The discount is only about 17%. I would get a lot for my money, but I can't afford it still. What do you think? If this were you, would you charge a family member this amount? Would you give them a better discount? I left there not knowing what to say. He basically assumed we wanted the wedding there, but I don't know how to tell him I can't afford it. Does anyone have advice or opinions on this situation? I'd REALLY appreciate it!!

I work for my family's business. I don't know if this is something I want to do for the rest of my life, but I recently had a baby and it works best for both my husband's and my schedule, I have job security in our current economic state, and flexible hours. However, some of the people I work with seem to have a problem with this. They seem to be angry that I get the hours I request and a bigger salary than some of them. I understand their frustration, but they need to understand that it IS a FAMILY BUSINESS. My ancestors built it from the ground up. If it wasn't for my family, neither they or I may even have jobs right now. When one of my relatives comes in and corrects them, they seem to take it out on me. It's not everyone; 3 girls imparticular. There was one incident where this one girl who is particularly spiteful toward me, kept going on and on about something I put back in the wrong place...in front of everyone. Now, the other day, she was talking rather loudly about the way I handled a REALLY rude customer; claiming I didn't "speak to him correctly" in front of other co-workers. I don't want to go run and tell my family because I don't want to make the situation any worse, but it is becoming truly frustrating. My younger sister also worked there part-time over the summer when she was home from college and they treated her in a similar way. I know it sounds petty, but 2 of them de-friended her on facebook. Probably so they could talk about her on there. They just won't drop the situation. I have never been rude to these girls, yet they keep trying to push my buttons. How can I handle them?

I have very bad panic attacks and before I started seeing a therapist, I was afraid to drive on the highway, get in an elevator, and get on an airplane (still haven't in years but we're working on it.) He prescibed me xanax and I've felt so good on it that I didn't notice the 15lbs I gained in 5 months. Could it be because I'm happier and eating more? or is it the actual pill increasing my appetite? I'll take the excess weight over the anxiety I used to encounter, but I'm just wondering if anyone has a definitive answer by experience because I get conflicting ones form everyone I know and even medical studies.

I know, it's the oldest complaint in the book but I don't know what to do here. I'll make this as short as possible. My husband and I went to his father-in-law's house for Christmas Day..we go to my grandparents house for xmas eve; they do a big party (I have a HUGE family) and we live on the 1st floor of a 2-family house with my parents and younger brother so they came downstairs for xmas morning to eat breakfast and see our daughter open her gifts. My husband has a very small family. So at his dad's apartment, it was just us, our daughter, his sister and her boyfriend, his other sister, and his dad. Here's the list of problems:

1.) I keep inviting them over because I want both sides of our daughter's family to get to know each other. They keep declining my invitations. Now, I have been inviting them over since I was pregnant! They always have some excuse. They barely even stop over to see our daughter. Hence, my daughter cries when they try to hold her and they get insulted. His one sister had the nerve to say to me, "maybe if you brought her over to see OUR side of the family once in awhile." Mind you, I work 40-45 hrs a week, as does my husband. She doesn't have a job; she goes to school to be an x-ray tech. I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that, but we have a lot more on our plates right now. Plus, she lives almost a half hour away in a bad neighborhood where there's never any parking. The same applies to my father in law minus the bad neighborhood. Is it really fair that I drag my 7month old out to these places all the time? Am I being irrational? Was her comment out of line? My family is always coming to visit and as I said, they are more than welcome in my apartment.

Now to top this off.....

2.) The same sister got me nothing for xmas. Meanwhile, she got my husband a very expensive coat so it wasn't a money issue. She kept insisting I look at the coat, almost rubbing it in my face. His father also got him at least $200 worth of clothing and got me a $50 gift card to Macy's...that said "Happy Birthday." =/ So it obviously wasn't even intended for me. My grandparents gave BOTH my husband and I a large sum of $, my parents got him tickets to a basketball game, cologne, a Target gift card, 2 books, and a shirt. My brother got him a video game and an itunes gift card. It's not even about the $ for me. It's just very obvious that my family thinks of him as family and not an in-law. His family obviously doesn't see me the same way. His family got our daughter some outfits. Mine got her a huge toybox full of toys. It's not a contest; my point is just that I had to go to the car to get her one of her toys from my parents because she was so bored Xmas day and it's almost as if they got mad about that too!

I feel like they are spiteful toward me because my family sees the baby more and they are more well off. I can't help this so why should I be punished for it? My family sees her more by default. We live in a 2-family with them. I don't see anyone in his family providing us with a beautiful apartment for a cheap rent. Oh, and btw...his sister has babysat our daughter 4 times and his dad never has...my mom, grandma, brother, aunt...countless times.

In conclusion, when I bring any of this to my husband he gets upset, which I understand because thats a tough position to be in. It always turns into some huge blow-up when it comes up but I'm in a bad position too and he needs to understand that too. He is a wonderful father, husband, and person and I don't want this to come between us but i'm at my wits end!! =( Help!

i am 2 months postpartum. I had a complicated delivery. WOULD NOT dialate; took about 24 hours for me to open up; then when I finally did I got an infection and blood pressure shot up to 157/100, but no eclampsia. After I got home, I had very bad hip/pelvic pain and radiating pain down my left leg. I got my first period around 7 weeks postpartum; very heavy but not too much cramping. The hip/leg pain went away but now it's back. I get like a sharp, stabbing pain in my left side, and it goes down my leg. What could this be? Everything looked good at my 6-week checkup according to my OBGYN. My blood pressure is also going down. It's usually around 128/85 (it used to be great; like 105/68 so that's high for me) I don't understand what this could be.I've also been experiencing a lot of anxiety; my mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer a week after I gave birth, so maybe my body never had the time it needed to rest and heal because I was back and forth to the hospital. My mom is home now and doing quite well. So, of course now I'm paranoid about her cancer and getting cancer myself. Maybe I'm mentally making the pain worse. As for the pain though, anyone else experience similar or same?

I am 2 months postpartum. I had a complicated delivery. WOULD NOT dialate; took about 24 hours for me to open up; then when I finally did I got an infection and blood pressure shot up to 157/100, but no eclampsia. After I got home, I had very bad hip/pelvic pain and radiating pain down my left leg. I got my first period around 7 weeks postpartum; very heavy but not too much cramping. The hip/leg pain went away but now it's back. I get like a sharp, stabbing pain in my left side, and it goes down my leg. What could this be? Everything looked good at my 6-week checkup according to my OBGYN. My blood pressure is also going down. It's usually around 128/85 (it used to be great; like 105/68 so that's high for me) I don't understand what this could be.I've also been experiencing a lot of anxiety; my mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer a week after I gave birth, so maybe my body never had the time it needed to rest and heal because I was back and forth to the hospital. My mom is home now and doing quite well. So, of course now I'm paranoid about her cancer and getting cancer myself. Maybe I'm mentally making the pain worse. As for the pain though, anyone else experience similar or same?

I'm referring to their performances in the Wrestler and Milk.

I know they have a tendency to blow things out of proportion. I also live in NYC and the New York media is the WORST for that, but what do you think? And is the media making a big deal out of it where you live? Are you worried at all?

But does anyone else think Mickey Rourke deserved the Oscar for his role in "The Wrestler?" Instead of Sean Penn for Milk? I just saw it last night and I thought Mickey Rourke gave an outstanding performance.

If you like one of them or both of them; feel free to answer this question too.

If so, which one?

If so, what did you have done? If you never have, would you like to? This is just a question. I personally never have nor want to but I'm wondering what your thoughts are. Thanks!

...if you like beer =)

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