Gordon

He was horrible to me and really hurt me, and 5 months after the breakup and pretty much no contact, he wants to meet up for a coffee and a chat. I'm not sure I want to see him again unless he apologises for what he did to me. I still haven't got over the feeling of betrayal and the way he treated me, I still cry almost every day and I don't understand why he treated me badly. But at the same time I'm curious as to how he's doing. Should I tell him that we can meet up if he apologises and understands how much he hurt me? I feel like i need the apology to be able to move on... If he isn't sorry for what he did to me and thinks I should be able to meet up for coffee and act normal as though he never ripped my heart out he can go f-k himself.

So, my best friend is a girl--let's call her Emma. Emma and I spent all last week together because we were both on holiday. One night she persuaded me to sleep in her bed with her, I figured nothing's going to happen so just as long as my girlfriend (let's call her Melanie) doesn't find out it's ok (a while back I slept in the same bed as another one of my female friends and my girlfriend asked me not to do it anymore, which I can understand, especially since we always sleep in our underwear--me and these girls are close but nothing ever happened between us; they're like my sisters).

Anyway, the next morning, when I was still half asleep, Emma took a photo of us in our underwear in bed and put it on facebook... It looked really bad.

Melanie saw it and freaked out... She told me she was angry that I'd slept in Emma's bed with her behind her back, and asked me to not mention Emma until she'd calmed down. That made me angry so I badmouthed her to Emma and said some mean stuff which I regret.

After that, Emma sent my girlfriend a rude message basically telling her that she's crazy and should see a psychologist for trust issues, that she should let me sleep next to her whenever I want, that she's known me for longer than she has, etc., and also told her the stuff I said about her when I was angry...

My girlfriend is really upset, and she wants me to tell Emma that she crossed the line and that I won't be sleeping with her in her bed any more (but that she's fine with us still being friends, just so long as if I stay over I sleep on the couch or something--she knows I didn't cheat). Emma thinks she's manipulating me and that she's being unfair.

I feel like I'm having to choose sides...

I don't know what to do...

Please help.

My fiancé and I broke up about 3 months ago. We were really close and wanted to spend our lives together, but he cheated on me and let the other woman belittle me; they both said mean stuff about me. He didn't want to break up but I wasn't happy any more and felt betrayed so we both decided to end our relationship. We tried to stay friends at first but it was too hard. After months of no contact, a few weeks ago he messaged me saying he'd like to meet up just to chat. I'm not sure if I should--I still think about how much he hurt me and I don't feel like I have anything nice to say to him. But at the same time I'm curious.

Should I say yes and see him again?

P.s. I have no feelings for him any more.

Hello people,

My now ex-boyfriend slept at this other girl's house without telling me. I found out about it because she posted a photo of both of them in their udnerwear in bed together on facebook.

I didn't think they were cheating; they've been friends for ages and he'd always told me that she was like a sister to him. But I still thought sleeping in the same bed with another girl behind my back was crossing the line, even if they didn't cheat, so talked to them both about it, explaining that I trusted them and respected their friendship, but that I didn't think sleeping together was respectful to our relationship.

They both kind of freaked out, saying I was a control freak, accusing me of never letting them see each other (...even though they'd been together 24/7 pretty much all week), that I didn't trust them and that I should go see a psychologist for my trust issues. Plus my (ex)-boyfriend really treated me like sh-t, said horrible things about me to his friends, etc.

That incident really hurt me and I couldn't understand why they reacted in such an extreme way to me not wanting them to sleep in a bed together behind my back anymore. We broke up a while after that because neither of us were happy.

Anyway, until yesterday I still truly believed that he'd never cheated on me with her and that they just overreacted to me saying I didn't want them sleeping together. Then, last night, I made the connection--could he have cheated and that's why they reacted so badly? Trying to beat me down before I found out the truth?

Do guys cheat on their girlfriends with "best friends" they say are like their "sisters"?

I'm having a hard time getting over the break up and would love some opinions.

Sorry this was so long.

Thanks!

I thought that radioactive decomposition changed the atom... or do atoms in NAA decompose into the same atoms as they were before? Or do such a tiny quantity of atoms become radioactive and decompose into something else that it doesn't really matter?

I don't geddit

I'll try not to make this too long...

My boyfriend and I broke up a week ago after being in a relationship for 3.5 years. (We're both 22.) It wasn't working out for several reasons: he'd moved in with his best friend very far away and we hardly ever got to see each other; my parents didn't like him and constantly pushed me to leave him and treated me like cr*p every time I went out to see him; and last but not least, we had had an argument about a month ago which turned really ugly and he told this lady-friend of his that I was a controlling b*tch [because I didn't want him sleeping in his underwear with her any more...], and he let her send me mean messages saying that I had a problem and should see a psychologist for my "extreme jealousy"... I never really forgave him for that... I still feel betrayed by what he did and how he turned his retarded lady-friend against me for not wanting him to have weird sleep-overs any more... anyway.

We broke up, it was painful and horrible. We had planned our whole future together, down to the types of dogs we'd have and how we'd raise our children. I haven't really slept or eaten properly for days and I cry all the time. But my parents are overjoyed. They aren't giving me any support at all. When I told them that we might get back together in the future, when we're more mature, have finished our studies etc., they said "no! don't do that! we're so happy!"...

I just feel awful. I don't know what to do or think or how to start to get over this. I just want to gather up my stuff and leave all of it, go and live in the woods or under a bridge or something.

If anyone has advice on how to get over a break-up like this it would be greatly appreciated!

I feel disrespected and taken for granted in my relationship. I've been with my bf for over 3 years and the bad things have just accumulated. I'm not happy any more with this guy, but I'm afraid to leave because we still love each other...The idea of not having him in my life scares me, but at the same time, when I think of him all I feel is anger and betrayal ...

Has anyone been in this kind of situation? How did it work out? How did you get through it?

Thanks

I'm not really happy with my boyfriend any more. I feel like he doesn't respect me and doesn't listen to me. Recently (while I was working and he was on holiday) he spent the entire week with this other girl (one of his childhood friends that he re-connected with not long ago), and slept at her house, in her bed next to her, in his underwear, without telling me (I found out because she took a photo of them in bed together and put it on facebook. WTF?).

I told him that wasn't cool and that I didn't want him to do it again. I'm pretty sure they didn't have sex, I trust him, I just don't think it's respectful of him to sleep next to other girls.

Of course the girl invited him over again on Saturday night, and I told him that I wanted to see him alone at least once this week and to not go and see her, and to just avoid talking about her because I was still pretty angry.

He just screamed at me and said that I "never let him see his friends" (but he'd seen her all week... what?!) and he also told her that I'd forbidden him to speak to her (which was totally untrue, I just wanted to spend Saturday with him!)

We met up on Saturday anyway and didn't talk about the arguments we'd had, so all was good. But I was still worried, so the next day I had a look at the messages he had sent to this girl on his phone... They'd been talking all day before I arrived, and agreed that I should see a psychologist for my "extreme jealousy" and that I should "shut my ******* face". The end of their conversation was: "I have to stop talking to you now, the b-tch is here and she'll just scream at me if she knows I'm talking to you".

:'(

I'm a very calm person and I never scream at him... All I wanted was for him not to see her on Saturday so that I could be alone with him, and for him to not sleep next to her any more...

Meh. I feel really betrayed and like crap. All his friends think I'm some psychotic jealous cow and they have no respect for me, and he has no respect for me either.

We often have arguments like this and I've reached my limit... But I still love him and I really don't want to leave him. I'm afraid that I'd regret it and come crawling back to him after a day. I'm miserable in this relationship, every day I wake up and I think about the things he said about me to the other girl and I just feel like sh-t. But I'm scared that leaving him would just make me feel worse...

What to do? Has anyone been sad in a relationship but still managed to break up even though they still loved their partner? Did you get back together again or were you happy being single?

I don't know what to do D:

I posted some pics of my boyfriend, and this really annoying lady keeps commenting "mmm sexy" and stuff like that on them, EVERY TIME. (She's a "friend" of my boyfriend's mum, he hardly knows her, she's just some lonely and kind of retarded housewife who likes to chat up guys 20 years younger than her on facebook.) I just blocked her. Anyway, will she still be able to see photos I post of my boyfriend and comment on them? Or if I've blocked her does that mean that she'll not see any of my posts even if they're about my boyfriend (who is still facebook friends with her)?

hi peoples,

I need some help in translating this sentence:

"I'm sorry I always pushed you away"

It's something along the lines of:

"Sorry dass ich dich immer weg schieben"

I'm having trouble conjugating the "schieben"... How do you say it in german?

thanks :D

My flatmate's dog has been acting weird today.. Usually he'll get up and be all over us when we come in the door and he always hovers by the kitchen door when we make food, but today he just lay in his bed and hardly moved... He did come and eat the leftovers though, but not as crazily as he usually does (normally he can't wait to get at the food and eats it as soon as it hits his bowl, this time he just seemed really tired and ate it kind of slowly...)

I can't tell if he has a fever and his eyes&nose don't look crusty or anything.

He's a dogo argentino and I think he's about 7 or 8 years old.

My flatmate doesn't seem to be worried; what do you guys think? Is he ill?

I know this mother who takes the train at the same times as I do every day with her two very young boys to accompany them to and from school (I'd say they're between 4 and 6 years old). She never talks to them about normal things a parent would, and never really allows *them* to speak to her about their day or their interests etc., she just reads to them from this bible and tells them about how great God is etc. etc., and that's all she ever talks about. Whenever they have questions about something in the stories she tells, she usually answers with a made-up religious story (the other day she made one up about London burning and Jesus coming to save the people because there was no water...) which pretty much always end with "if you aren't good you'll go to hell"... She just seems emotionally distant from them and completely immersed in her religion and her effort to pass it on to them...

I know all this because I live in a french speaking country and this woman speaks English (with a strong American accent) very loudly to her children on the train and thinks that the people sitting near her don't understand what she's saying (she also takes the liberty of openly criticizing people she doesn't like the look of, in front of her children too, thinking that they won't understand...). I have listened to her every day for almost a month now.

I'm fine with religion, my parents are religious. But with me they were never like this lady is with her children...

Do you think this kind of upbringing is healthy?

Just wondering what other peoples' points of view are. I know I shouldn't judge but I can't imagine how her children are going to react to all this when they're older...

How do you think they'll end up?

First off, to anyone who's considering cheating on their partner--DO NOT DO IT.

I cheated (for the first and last time) about 1.5 years ago, and I told my boyfriend about it and he forgave me (thank god). I have been faithful since and haven't spoken to the guy since. Thing is, he was one of my best friends, and now he's trying to be friends with me again... Always trying to add me on facebook, writing messages to me, phoning me, texting me, etc. I delete everything because I promised my boyfriend I would not see him or speak to him anymore, and I don't want him to see the messages and think I'm cheating again...

My boyfriend (who I'm still with--been together for 4 years now) is always on my phone or my facebook, because I don't have anything to hide from him (and I don't want him to think that I have anything to hide). But I'm afraid that he might see one of the messages one day... I feel like if I tell him that the guy is trying to talk to me again he'll go and beat him up, or if I answer the guy myself and say that I don't want us to be friends out of respect for my boyfriend, it might encourage him to keep messaging me...

I also feel bad for the guy because we were good friends and cheating messed everything up between us, and I think it really hurt him when I told him goodbye and that we could never see each other or speak to each other again. I was a complete b-tch to my boyfriend AND to him... I want to tell him I'm sorry but again, I don't want to encourage him...

I dunno what to do.

Should I tell my boyfriend? Should I write to the guy? Should I just ignore it and keep deleting the messages hoping that my boyfriend never sees them...?

Any advice would be great...

(And I know I'm a horrible person for cheating, I still can't sleep some nights from the guilt--no need to remind me.)

How do you say:

"I'm sorry I was so mean to you"

Is it something like

"Es tut mir leid dass ich so gemein mit dir war"

...?

I'm not sure about the gemein... Sounds weird...

What does this mean in English:

Dieser Umstand macht die Kernresonanzspektroskopie zu der unempfindlichsten spektroskopischen Methode schlechthin, ein Makel, der jedoch durch den Informationsgehalt der Methode mehr als wettgemacht wird.

It's for my science exam (the lesson was in german)...

Thanks :)

I'm not really happy with my boyfriend anymore... He treated me like crap today and insulted me in front of all his friends... But I still love him...

Should I leave?

What made you leave?

I'll try not to make this too long...

Basically, we have pet rats and the young female has a respiratory infection. My boyfriend really wanted to find a male rat and get her pregnant, but I said no because 1) we don't have enough time or money on our hands for rat babies, 2) it would be really bad for the mother rat because she's ill, 3) when the babies are born they might just catch the mother's infection and die, 4) if they survive we probably won't be able to find homes for them and they'll just end up as snake food.

Anyway, when I said no, my boyfriend had a fit and put a status up on his facebook page about how he was "selling my rats for snake food because my girlfriend doesn't want them anymore!" and "you can have my girlfriend too if you want!"... When people started asking what was going on he just said that I was a b-tch and wasn't happy unless I always got what I wanted (which is more like *his* behaviour, having a fit like that just because I said that it's a bad idea to have rat babies...)

Then he tried to leave me through WhatsApp. At this point I was really shocked by his reaction and grovelled a bit to try and get him back and calm him down.

But honestly I don't know if I still want to be with him after this. He's always complaining at me anyway, just because I spend half my time having to act like his mother because he always does irresponsible sh-t (like trying to get our rat to have babies even though I can barely pay the vet bills for her respiratory infection as it is--yes, *I* pay the bills, not him) and I have to tell him no.

I don't think he's happy with me anymore, and I hate the fact that I have to act like his mum and just annoy him all the time... But I don't know if I should leave him (if I'm ready to leave him) or not...

What should I do?

Please help

We've been together for 3 years, he's 22 and I'm 21.

Do they put ice on you? Give you ibuprofen and paracetamol? Or do they give you stronger drugs...?

How does your mood change towards your partner?

Do you feel really sad/depressed with your partner one day and completely in love and happy the next? How long to the sadness/love phases last?

I've been with him for about 3 years now. Our relationship has had its highs and its lows... the lows were always very low and painful to me, and when I remember things that he did which hurt me (even things he did months ago) it makes me really angry and frustrated.

Mainly he drinks way too much and flirts with other girls; I can't go to a party with him ever without having a sh*t time and being completely ignored for the whole evening.

Last weekend he drank far too much, beat up his friend and then cried and let billions of other girls who were at the party "comfort" him and hug him etc. I wasn't there, he told me this the next morning (he had also promised me that we would go out and do stuff together on sunday, so I got up early and went to see him as soon as I could, when I got there he was still drunk (at 11AM) and complained the whole day about being tired and hung over ad wouldn't shut up about how drunk he was even though he knows I hate it... we didn't even go out in the end).

He also ruined my 21st birthday a few weeks ago because he was completely drunk and treated me like crap, basically saying "all your university friends left because they're boring; now just sit quietly alone in the corner and let me have fun with *my* friends"... His friends are all between 14 and 16 years old and also act like idiots with alcohol (which was why all my friends left--I don't blame them!!), but it's ok for them, they're young and they'll grow out of it (and even they have more self control than my boyfriend and know when to stop!!!), my boyfriend is 22.

The worst times which I really can't forget were his ex girlfriend's birthday party, where I stood alone and held his drink for hours while he danced with little 16 year old sluts--all in their underwear, him included, and when I finally got tired of being completely ignored and told him to stop dancing with them he had a fit and went and cried in all the other girls' arms and hid in a tiny room with them from me, and left me crying in the car for hours.

New year's eve two years ago was also pretty bad; him and his step father both got completely drunk and ran around naked for hours and then puked for hours; me and the rest of the people he invited just got bored and had a sh*t time. I didn't know anyone (it was the beginning of our relationship) so I felt pretty alone.

This sunday, he asked me if I was angry with him, and I told him that every time he got drunk like that it reminded me of the times he really hurt me, like at new year's eve and his ex's party; all he had to say was "oh yeah! that was such a great party!!!" -__-

I feel like I never get the chance to tell him how frustrating it is to me. I hate seeing him that drunk. (I drink too, so I'm not trying to stop him from drinking altogether--I just want him to control himself and learn where his limits are before he does stupid sh*t!!!)

I really love him, but at the same time I'm getting really, really frustrated with him. When he's not drunk he's very nice to me (buys me chocolates, says he loves me, etc.). He forgives and forgets very easily every time we argue, I don't. To him our relationship is perfect and he wants to spend his life with me; I'm not sure I feel the same way any more.

Meh I think this was mainly to vent my frustration haha. But advice on how to cope with being frustrated all the time is welcome ^_^