I am an indian. i love a girl who s also indian. we belong to different castes. my parents are a bit traditionalist. they are not allowing us to get married. i am well settled and earning very well. my parents re hurt and they re not accepting our relation. i cant go against their will, i cant even think of leaving this girl. the girl is the best that anyone can get. i have tried my best to explain things to my parents. its 3 days now since i spoke to them about this. but they re stubborn.
what should i do???
2006-08-24T04:55:56Z
the problem i have is because my parents say either chose us or the girl. what i am supposed to do?? its like i am asked either choose your left eye or right eye. which one you need more??
anabele62006-08-24T04:54:37Z
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Every child loves his/her parents and never wants to disappoint them; however, if you are an adult, you need to make your own decisions, with or without your parent's approval.
Talk to them again and tell them that you love this girl, and can't imagine living with out her. Tell them that you plan to marry her and spend the rest of your life with her. Hopefully they will come around.
Well, correct me if I am wrong, I believe that if you go against your parents, you may lose your tribal status and have to go before the tribal elders. You could jeopardize being out-casted. But at what price. Would you have regrets for the rest of your life? Just do what you want. You already know the answer to your situation, but I think your looking for someone to write what your thinking. Love is a disease that everyone wants. It starts out just like a virus, and hopefully, there is no cure when you catch it. Finding a soul mate in this day seems to be more and more difficult to find, and when you do find it, you better find a way to keep it close to you because when you do catch this love virus, the only medication for it is to have the one that gave it to you to never leave your side. Follow your heart and let the mind follow it also. Your decision should be sharp and accurate. Once made, you cannot take it back. If it is love, I mean truly love, then you will be with her no matter what. Even a shallow man that has a love for money cannot stave the power of love. Good luck my generous warrior. Please, be well and listen to your heart.
If you are thinking about marriage, then you must be of a mature age and mind. Talk to your parents like the mature adult you are and try to know what they have against your girl. Maybe its not the caste thing but something else that they see but you don't. And maybe if you let them see how worthy she is of you then maybe they will relent. (Your parents just want you to be happy!)
You love your parents, you love the girl. You lose one or the other (or so you say).
If you live in a community where the culture dictates that you cannot marry beyond your caste then perhaps you should not. If you really want to marry the girl move to a community where it is acceptable. Which means whatever you decide to do, you live with the consequences.
Your parents have lived their life. Now this is your life. If they cannot understand what is happiness for their son, you have full right to choose your life partner. You are well settled, buy another house and live separately with her. At the same time also keep relation with parents. Enough of sacrifices..........Indians are always doing sacrifices.........but I don't think it is worth in this case. You are not parent's property, but human being.
Only you know if the girl means that much to you, your parents might be mad for a while but they will get over it. Especially when they see how happy you are with her. Don't break up with the girl because of your parents- you will resent them forever. Best of luck in life and love.