this is not what it sounds like. I actually do quite well with dealing with customers in the accounts on my route but I had something happen today that I can't seem to shake.
I had a woman who, after realising that I have facial piercings (septum and two lip piercings) decided to start calling me metal face. That...I could ignore....her telling me that I couldn't make it through a metal detector when I know I can...I could ignore....
she asked me WHY I had the piercings. I calmly told her that it is no different than choosing a necklace to wear or what colors of makeup to put on. which really is how I feel. I'm 26 and have no need to be "rebellious", this is just simply how I chose to adorn myself.
she proceeded to tell me that I was stupid and that I would want to take them out. I shook my head in disagreement. and then the part that is digging at me.... she told me that I would take them out when I decided to "stop being a heathen and become a woman."
now usually I do well with ignoring the stares that I get from little old ladies and some of the off colour remarks (particularly about my septum) but that just absolutely floored me.
she followed me around the store for about 10 minutes telling me to "be a woman". I think the only reason why she stopped and finally paid for her selections was because I stopped responding to her.
so really, the question is, should this situation arise again, is there anything that I can really DO other than ignoring it?
2009-07-13T19:06:39Z
the audacity of the statement floored me. I could maybe see it if I were NOT in a work situation and slacking off...or maybe a teenager up to no good...
the (soda) company that I work for has an open policy regarding tattoos and piercings, so its not like I'm bending any rules. if any of the stores on my route had a policy against them, I would have to take out/cover them, but none of my accounts are like that.
funw/sharpthings2009-07-13T19:24:14Z
Favorite Answer
people suck. what can you do. i like to remind people that when they were kids, they did things that their elders didn't like, such as shaking their hips to elvis or doing the twist with the 'colored' kids. the bottom line is that there is nothing you can do about it. maybe look up a bible verse about being judgemental. most old people are christians. maybe she would respond to that? are you a vendor? was the lady your customer or your customer's customer. you can't mess with your customer's customers, but, you can walk off the floor and have a soda break. i also like the idea of spitting on her. fortunately, these people are getting older and older
What a *****! You handled that way better than I could have, and since when does having facial piercings make you any less of a woman? I hate that there are people that ignorant in this world but the sad truth is there are. I've had similar yet not nearly as dramatic instances at my job. One customer asked if I had a Satanic ritual to attend later just because I was wearing dark fingernail polish (purplish black). I told him I actually had a few goats to sacrifice but that was it. He then told me I needed to get to a church as soon as possible (not in a joking tone). I didn't realize that the color of my nails signifies my religion. I've also gotten the stupid comments about regretting piercings and "why would you do that?" type deal.
Enough of my own ranting I guess I'm just saying I totally see where you're coming from and I think you responded as an adult, unlike your customer. Next time I would totally threaten to get security if the harassment continues because that is exactly what she was doing, harassing you...and everyone else has made valid points.
It sounds like you make deliveries to various stores and this was a customer who was in the store when you entered. All you can do is to be polite. This woman is a customer of the store and you can't do anything that would lose them business. However, once you had expressed yourself - and it was clear that you did it completely and nicely, you could have excused yourself and gone into the manager's office to get away from her.
There are religious people who feel that piercings and tattoos are defiling God's work. There are people who shudder when they see piercings, especially of the septum. There are fanatics and lonely people. You can't just shut them up.
Next time, consider answering with a very short answer - not trying to explain or excuse yourself or give reasons. Then say you are sorry, but you have to get back to work. Then say sorry a couple of times if the person persists, then don't respond. If it gets too bad, see the manager or hide out for a bit. I know you want to educate the world but can't always do that.
For general questions and judgments, I would ask the person in a nice tone why it matters them so much. They probably won't have a real answer, because really, why do they care?
But the lady you described was just plain rude and nasty, and I would not feel the need to be nice after the conversation turns that corner. You did the right thing by ignoring her. Some people are just too ignorant to be reasoned with, and arguing will only make you more upset. Just tell the person they are being disrespectful and end the conversation. Customer service, as far as I am concerned, does not extend to allowing yourself to be insulted or humiliated by anyone.
My opinion is that you were more of a "woman" than she by explaining yourself and when that didn't work, simply refusing to respond. Some people just can't comprehend the idea that other people think differently than them, they simply think that their ideas are right, and all others are wrong, much like a lot of the traditional establishments of many societies. My advice is to stick to your guns, and don't over-explain yourself, if a simple explanation isn't good enough, I'm sure that a long winded in depth one will not do the job either. Just politely inform them that it's a decision that you've made and are very happy and comfortable with, if they can't understand that, then you don't know what else to say. Hope these words help you out, it's nice to know that there are still people out there who are true to themselves, even if other people don't get it.