Poem of a Military Girlfriend...?
I wrote this after finding out about my boyfriend's deployment. feedback is greatly appreciated. thanks.
Praying in Disbelief
You tell me you love me, but you also love her
You tell me you're mine, but I know she is yours
I sit awake every night and these feelings I ponder
About all of these questions that I have wondered
Is is possible to pray, and not to believe?
Is is possible to love, to love and still leave?
Can I believe in the best, but still fear the worst?
Can we outshine the rest, and make this love work?
As I look to the future, I see the end near
But do I face it head on, or tremble with fear?
I hold you now, and it feels like forever,
Knowing soon I'll look back and it'll feel like never.
I can now feel you breathing and hear your heart pound,
In this moment I can't believe all the love I have found.
But what shall I do when you're miles away?
And I'm forced to live life day after day.
Should I wait lonely and quietly too,
Praying for your return to say, "I do."
But what if you don't,
And your heart, it won't?
What if you can't marry me, 'cause you've got her,
And she changes everything that you once wear.
You set me aside and made her a promise,
To go running anytime, no matter the problem.
She gives you comfort and she pays for your bills,
She puts you through college and gives you money still.
You gave her your word to always be true,
That's why you wear proudly, her red, white, and blue.
You swore to her before you could me,
So now there's no doubt, she'll get my ring.
You say just this once and you will return,
My fear is a second and third is what your heart will yearn.
I know tears will fall as I watch you leave,
But I will stay praying, praying in disbelief.