ok so let me give you a little back ground info on this question. my husband and i when we got married didn't get to have a big wedding, it was pretty quick and basically we got eloped because he was military and he was shipping out soon so we wanted to do it before he left. while he was away thigs happened and we were seperated on the verge of divorce for a little over two years. within the last few months we have gotten back together and it's stronger than ever now. so we are super exited about our second chance and renewed points of view on one another. we were looking to get our vows renewed.
i figured that since we never had a real ceremony that maybe we could do it now? with the white dress and the whole she-bang. but, i'm not sure if this is proper. how is a renewal of vows supposed to be? because when i've seen them they're kind of informal, and there isn't much of a ceremony, like a full-blown wedding. how does this work?how would i go about this?
?2010-12-09T12:11:45Z
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I say go whole hog. Whatever you want. White dress, sparkles tiara, whatever floats your boat. I think anyone who badly wants th big white wedding should get to do it once, even if it's "just a renewal". What I don't get is people who have already done it, doing it again. As long as you don't renew your vows every 5 years and expect everyone to stump up the cost of a huge wedding, I think thats just fine.
Do it once, and make sure you do it exactly how you wanted. You may have family and friends who want to share that with you and never got the chance. Have a great time!
Obviously you can do whatever the two of you would like to do. If you want a big wedding affair, a white dress, a ceremony etc., it's all up to you. You plan it like you would plan any wedding, or anniversary affair. With planning it you must decide everything that you would decide with any wedding or any party. How much money do you have to spend? What is important to you? Where? How many guests? Food? Alcohol? Dress? Tux? Attendants? Gifts? Minister? Church? Announcements? and the list goes on and on and on.
Frankly, if you were my daughter, and you have only been married a couple of years and are just getting back together etc., I would encourage you to have your vows renewed in a church in front of friends and family and the congregation during a Sunday service. It would be brief. Just wear a pretty dress and the husband in a regular suit. Then the two of you should just go on a lovely vacation/honeymoon. You need to focus on eachother. Solidify your bond with eachother.
I completely understand how you feel. But you don't say how long you've been married, how long he was serving overseas. You were separated for 2 years and have been back together for a few months. Renewing your vows at this time will probably do a lot to strengthen your bond. But I think it should be a small intimate ceremony. Save the big blow out ceremony for a milestone anniversary, like your 10th or 15th.
Congratulations! You can do whatever you want. It's really up to you and if you want to make this your wedding, go for it. Talk to the person who is going to officiate it and ask how to go about it. My parents renewed their vows at their 25th anniversary and they had a mass and did the vows and everything. It wasn't formal but it can be.
Since it's your ceremony, I say do it up or down however you like. :) Personally, I would never do an informal ceremony, because my vows are a huge deal to me, and I would want to take them seriously and treat them as such. I think it's great you guys stayed together and the two of you should take this second chance seriously. Congrats guys.