Can Your Favorite Classical Music Pun Top This Gem?
A Famous Line From Baroque Bach Mountain: A lonesome cowboy sits by the fading light of a campfire with his I-Pod earphone plugged in while he listens to classical music. Sadly, he laments to no one but himself ‘I wish I knew how to quit you Johann.’
(It’s not my joke. by the way. It’s from a daily comic strip called ‘Bizarro’ but still just about the funniest one I’ve ever heard.)
2012-04-08T19:01:50Z
Several weeks after his death workers were moving Beethoven’s casket to a new location and dropped the casket. The lid popped open and the astonished workers saw the great master sit up while hold a score he was busily erasing. One of the braver workers asked the Master what he was doing. Beethoven’s reply: “I’m obviously de-composing.”
2012-04-16T09:57:46Z
There are NO wrong answers here and some pretty damn funny ones and if it were up to me most of you would share the best answer. I can't honestly select a 'best' from among these when the humor ranges from the esoteric to slap-stick just as effectively. So, let's let you guys decide.
joshuacharlesmorris2012-04-08T18:48:36Z
Favorite Answer
These two are for those well versed in classical music jokes (caution only for those who like deceptive cadences): Why was it difficult to find Beethoven's teacher? Because he was Albrechtsberger.
Why did J.S Bach have so many children? Because he was very affectionate with his wife.
Richard Strauss had an obsessive crush on the actress Sarah Bernhardt. To that end, while she was in town on tour, Strauss started showing up at her apartments. Bernhard'ts Chamber Maid opened the door, and there was Strauss, bouquet of flowers in hand, pleading to be allowed to see her.
The chamber maid relayed his request, telling Strauss, "She said if you walked her pet leopard she vill consider seeing you." Strauss, with some trepidation nonetheless readily accepted, the leopard was brought to him on leash, and he left the apartments and took the animal for a walk.
When he returned, the Chamber maid told him, "Next, zu vill valk ze pet Volf: again he capitulated, and after returning from walking the Wolf, he again asked for his audience with Sarah Bernhardt.
The maid said, "Miss Bernhardt now asks, if you have any real affection for her, that you valk ze pet lion." Again, with some fear, the hopelessly smitten Richard Strauss accepted this task, left the apartment, and with great difficulty, walked the lion.
When he returned, hoping that three was the magic number and charm, he asked if he could then at last see Miss Bernhardt.
The Chamber Maid said to him, "But now, Richard, zu must also valk Zarah's Rooster."
Schoenberg's composition student said that he wanted to write a passacaGlia for his next assignment. Schoenberg said, "Oh no! The word is passacaLLia. The G is silent." The following week, Schoenberg looked over the student's manuscript and said, "What is this! There are only eleven tones in the row!" The student said, "But I thought you said last week that the G was silent."