Question about virginity please?
So, let's say you're a sophomore in college and you are still a virgin. Tbh you haven't even really made out with a boy before either... but you just recently met a guy in one of your classes and he seems to be flirting with you... He seems pretty sweet and caring and asks you questions because he's interested in you. He can be kinda goofy in his demeanor sometimes, but he seems fun... He also has a TON of female friends; when you guys are talking and one of them comes over, he introduces you to them, and then proceeds to talk to them for a bit. He also seems REALLY busy, what with the organizations he's part of and the jobs he has. Now let's say you accompanied him to one of his classes, where he sat next to a girl he already introduced you to, and she kept pulling him over to talk to him, while you sat there awkwardly in a class you aren't even taking. Then, when the prof turned off the lights and turned on a movie, he played around with your hands a lot, and then just kinda held and stroked them. YOU then proceeded to be VERY turned on... what with the contact and the him smelling good. Then, you couldnt help but remember things like the fact that you don't think he is super good-looking (he's more just adorable than anything else- though he has nice arms haha), and then you remember that he seemed kinda distant while you 2 were sitting outside of his class and his friends (all female) were going to class (or wherever).
THEN, you remember this thing you keep feeling, where you are not looking for any kind of commitment at all right now, nor would you ever commit to this boy-- you aren't all that into HIM per se as you are into things like the way he smells or the way his face looks sometimes.
You can definitely admit that sometimes you are VERY turned on by him. He comes off as a little inexperienced (you are too), but you cant help but keep fantasizing about just jumping on this boy. You've read things online so you feel somewhat more prepared, and you're actually feeling really good about yourself and you feel kinda different already, like more confident maybe?
The problem is, you cant seem to find a good time to express these feelings. As you know, he's really busy (unlike you for the most part), and, even though he sort of offered to hang out, you and he just don't seem to be on the same page. He offered to hang out around the afternoon one day, you told him you couldn't do anything until later around 830, then you ask him if he'd be able to hang out then. First he says he can, then he texts later saying that he has a class until 945. You're thinking things like, "Sounds good! The later the better! ;)" but you don't know if you should say something like that; you get the feeling that this just might freak him out, though you could be wrong...
You're a little pissed because you weren't really overthinking this at all, but now that this is the second time he has kinda blown you off, you're starting to think...
So, 2 things keep coming up in your head now (I know, you tend to think a lot...):
1) You aren't completely sure if this is a guy you might want to do anything with. Part of you is screaming, "YES. You, me. Right now. Lets go," and part of you is like, "Well, maybe this is a sign? I mean, no offense, but there is the possibility that you might be settling... You aren't completely into this guy, but you are getting really horny, and this guy does make you kinda hot... and you are excited to be exercising your sexual freedom...
2)AND you feel like maybe the fact that you aren't really attached to this guy is good because you could practice on him for someone you eventually do meet that you are like in love with... and this guy doesn't come off as a real asshole, so...
I mean, "losing your virginity" isn't a problem for you at all... in fact, you are really excited to do it already; it sounds like a lot of fun... you just aren't completely convinced that this guy is the one you want to remember as the first guy you did it with...
What are your thoughts? They would be very appreciated right now..