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My man hides pornos and watches them by himself. I just found them and he denies they are his.?

I have suggested we watch one together before and he said no, now I find 2 hidden and he denies they are his. Why would he not want to watch them with me and then lie when I find them? Are sex life is great, I just thought watching one would turn it up a bit.

Update:

It makes me feel like I am not good enough or can't satisfy him. I guess I want him to want to watch me or want me to touch and watch him, not a movie.

17 Answers

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  • Jinx U
    Lv 5
    2 decades ago
    Favorite Answer

    Porn isn't one of those things that everybody is ok with. It could be that he's embarrassed of his interest in them - that might be why he lied about them. I'd say that you did great. Let him know that you're open to watching one with him sometime...that let him know that you don't think less of him for watching them, right?

  • Anonymous
    2 decades ago

    Do you have a child or children that's old enough to be watching them? Is there anything you to don't do together that's in those movies? If there's something more you want and he's not giving then maybe he doesn't want to see you in that way. Try talking to him without raising your voice and showing too much emotion and see if he comes around. Ask yourself is the sex filled with lovey dovey or is filled with intense passion with a touch of lust, also ask yourself does it last as long as you'd like. peace out pimp.

  • 2 decades ago

    yeah i agree he is probly shy or he might be telling tha truth i don't know but next time watch one while he is walkin in the door and tell him u want jack him off and be serious and the next day go buy on for him or/ make ur own, that way he watching u instesd of some random girl but u have to be freaky and not your self, do a bit of role playing, the screaming and all that good stuff so next time he watches it, it feels new and exciting

  • 2 decades ago

    Yeah my husband, now my ex, did the same thing to me. And yes, he denied the tapes were his. But a few times I came home from work early, found out he was not at the job but home watching these nasty videos by him self, in my living room couch playing with him self.

    Need I say more....

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  • 2 decades ago

    Words of wisdom.. Pick your battles. Is this a real problem? You said your sex life is great, maybe the movies help him with his creativity. If it really bothers you offer to make a movie with him. That way he is watching you. Lots of people want to consider porn dirty... but it also is instructional.

  • 2 decades ago

    There may be something he likes in them that he thinks may shock you .... As others have suggested watch one before he arrives, it should turn him on. But no chastizing if you see something you won't do. Seduction starts in the mind and men are visually stimulated and want to experiment if only in the mind.

  • 2 decades ago

    Men are babies sometimes. Forgive him this once for watching without you. From now on you just be the one watching when he comes in. It will most likely turn him on. Especially if you be very naughty. Works every time.

  • 2 decades ago

    Instead of asking him does he want to watch it---just pop the movie in one night and watch it with him! It can be the start of some fun action!

  • 2 decades ago

    He obviously has some shame about this. This shame disables him from sharing it with you -- what man wants to feel that "weakening" emotion in front of their woman? Chris Rock the comedian says "every man's got to have a little porn, not an illegal amount, just enough to get by". Funny, but true. If you understand he has shame around it, this is something you might be able to "let slide". Meaning, if it is not a major detriment to your relationship (he watches to exclution of sex with you, spending all your cash on it, spends inordinate amount of time doing it instead of spending it with you) then perhaps you can decide to let him have this one private thing. I rarely watch porn myself, but would not want to watch it with my lover. Some things are just private and perhaps that's OK. As long as your sex life is good and you are both happy, then let him have his secret. Just let him know, if he ever wants to watch with you, that you think it might be "hot" and "fun" and that you are open to doing that with him. Don't force the issue. It's not really about honesty (yes, he lied... but) and more about shame. Just let him know you think that porn is "okay" and that you'd prefer to share it with him, but if needs it to be private, then tell him that's okay too. Giving permission removes some of the shame. The more you push it and get mad for him lying, the more he will retreat. He is saying it's "not his" (BS of course) but, just telling him, "well honey, I think porn is kinda hot and if you ever want to share it with me, it could be fun. AND if you ever want to have some of your own and you don't want to share it, that's okay too. I want to respect your privacy as long as it doesn't negatively affect us as a couple. Okay?" Try some of those ideas on for size, see if they fit.

    Source(s): I'm a professional therapist.
  • 2 decades ago

    mhe may be shy .. i had a friend who never watched with u , and we thought he was a guy who dos-int like it .. but some days later we found out that he used to watch it in his home alone .. so u don't need to worry about that, maybe u can just bring one CD and play it in fron of him , and observe his reactions towards that

  • 2 decades ago

    a girlfriend that actually wants to watch porn with her mate...

    WHERE CAN THOSE BE FOUND?? I had a one nighter that wanted to do it to porn. But have never had a g/f that would. Sounds like your dude has some issues he's afraid to let you in on. Good luck Babe...

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