How do you deal with step children and stealing/lying?

went and sometimes still go through the same issue. my step daughter is 10 my two girls are 11 and 12. She steals constantly and lies. she plays both sides.

The best advice is this. (your husband has to support this or it will not work.)

Her moms house is her moms house. Dont complain about mom to me. let dad deal with it. Dont let her gripe about her mom to you. Let her know to deal with it with her mom or her dad.

The issue with stealing. If you find out that she stole something, she replaces it with her own money or something comperable of her own. I let my kids sometimes pick. i have tried searching her, but it gets old.

The best bet is to call her on it. Its not acceptable. Make sure dad is part of it.

If your husband has a good relationship with the mom, see if she is having the same problem. IF she will do the same at her house, it may help.

Also dont let her play nicy nice to you. Let her know it aint cuttin it. that the stuff stops or she will see how it feels getting treated this way. SHe is ultimately seeing that she gets attention from playing sides. When the sides start playing her...then it will stop.

This needs to be a forever thing. you cant be laxed and let her start it up again.

Hopefully she grows up and it stops.

Email me if you would like to talk more.

Being a stepchild myself, I can tell you that you must have your husbands support on this issue. I realize that you are concerned for your daughter in all of this, but without his help you could be creating bigger problems. If the younger sister has confirmed to you that she has stolen those things, tell your husband. Explain to him that it is not your place to call her mother and that he needs to step up and help resolve the issue. He is the only one in fact, that can call over there, talk to her and her mother, and create a reasonable punishment without creating more problems. He must understand this to some degree being a parent himself. The fact is that you are the adult and he should be listening to you not just what his daughter says. Good luck, and keep faith in her even when she does bad things from time to time. I know first hand that is very important and will make both of your lives richer in the long run.

I would confront the stepdaughter alone to see if she fesses up and to try and save her from any embarassment...if she doesn't own up to the stealing and lying, I would then call upon the family for an intervention of sorts to find out what the real problem is...she is probably just jealous of you because she feels you are taking time with her Dad away from her....not an ideal situation to be in, be it's solveable, good luck!

Dealing With Stepchildren

you, the stepdaughter's mother, and the step daughter's father,have to set down in one place and lay all of the fact's on the line.the three of you have to team up and show parental authority or otherwise the girl is going keep playing the three of you for fools.a 11 yr old is making you all look stupid.

You and dad need to have a real talk. I would make an apt with him-and not do anything until he listens, not dinner no clean clothes no nothing-get his attention and tell him you must solve the problem or its good bye. Men (I'm a man) are mostly brain dead-you have to get their attention. If you ever get it-he will listen...then you gotta work it out.

don't allow her access to your daughter's stuff. or try a hidden video camera. just don't get sucked into the trash talk - your behavior is teaching your children more than your words are!

thats a good one, my ex gf of 8 yrs lied all the time and her kids were from hell, i couldnt take it anymore so i left

first off get her and her mother together with you and then confront her and if does not get better then when she leaves your house to go to her mom's go through her things and show your husband she is a lier

Before she leaves your home --- ask her to empty her pockets and open her overnight bag - so you can make sure she has all her own belongings ----