funny misquotes?

I can't think of the name of the song but, a friend of mine was singing along to the song that goes...."I'm not in love, so don't forget it, it's just a silly thing I'm going through......." Anyway there is a part in the song where the words are "big boys don't cry, big boys don't cry." And it was sooooooo hilarious because he said..."requesting quiet, requesting quiet..." I had to listen to the song again because, it really does sound like that's what it says, It was just soooo funny to hear it sung wrong but funnier to see how perfectly his mistaken words fit too.

Funny Misquotes

I worked at McD's when I was 17. This hot chick came up to the register and I said "May I have you" instead of "May I help you" and it was totally by accident. One of those things where you re thinking it in your head but don't mean to say it outloud...she didn't think it was funny but everyone else did

An uneduated woman was trying to be a big shot and make an impression. She was riding with someone who was a really bad driver. When they finally arrived where they were going, she opened the car door and announced, "We have reached our destiny." Of course, she meant their destination.

I remember in high school an illiterate reader was reading aloud from a book to the class something mentioning the word calculus, she read... the sentence pronouncing it like this- calkoooozzuuuuu.

The story I heard was the court jester being hanged for his bad jokes around the castle. A last-minute reprieve from the king gained him just enough breath to say, "No noose is good noose"--- so they hung him anyway.........

I had a boss at the super market once tell me to get him a jar of Marchiano cherries. And he was serious! Cracked me up!

I heard a boxer on the news last night say "You cant read everything that you hear in the newspaper". Made me shake my head in wonder...guess he got one too many right hooks upside his noggin

Thats a good saying im going to tell my wife right now

Like why, buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?,

or as some women would say, " why buy the pig if your only gonna get a little sausage,"!!