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Q's about the Catholic Church and marriage?
Thank you to all that answered my question about why the catholic church requires an annulment from my irst mariage so that my ex can get remarried, although I found a few of your answers a little slanderous because I don't believe is some of the catholic churches beliefs....However, my ex husband was the one that filed for the divorce in the first place because he said that he basically was still a child and wasn't ready for the responsibility of marriage. Because I'm a christian, I don't believe divorce as ever being and option before or during a marriage. We were married by the pastor of our church, in the sight of God and fellow believers. A year and a half later he wants adivorce, gets one, now wants me to help him so that he can get married in the catholic church. Does this seem right and fair? I don't support that religion, but don't want to deny him happiness? What would you do?
18 Answers
- CaritasLv 61 decade agoFavorite Answer
That depends on what they need you to do. You shouldn't hold him back out of spite (however much he may deserve it); he is his own person and should have the right to live life as he chooses even if that hurts you. An annulment essentially states, however, that the marriage never took place. They may ask you questions to help confirm or deny this claim. Answer them truthfully and without skewing your responses to either help or hinder him, and then let the Church decide. That's really the best and most equitable thing you can do.
- imacatholic2Lv 71 decade ago
The Catholic Church believes that God does not recognize civil divorces.
"Therefore what God has joined together, no human being must separate." (Mark 10:9)
The term "annulment" is a misnomer because the Church does not undo or erase a marriage bond. Rather the Church issues declarations of nullity when it discovers that the parties were not truly joined by God and hence a full spiritual sacramental marriage as understood by the Church was not present.
Then the parties are free to marry for the first time.
Be prayerful, honest and patient. It takes a while.
With love in Christ.
- cindyLv 61 decade ago
I would say above all else stay true to your own beliefs and that of the bible.
You are not denying him happiness, you are actually saving him from being an adulteror in Gods eyes.
This is between him and GOD and he may already be committing this sin, but at least you are not helping him do it.
Explain your beliefs to him and use the bible to show him why you believe the way that you do. Chances are being a Catholic, he has not read his bible, and if he has, he certainly will not want to understand this scripture as it will go against his own self will.
Self will and wanting something other than what God wants for us is the true problem here, and he needs to learn that at some point in his life. It is not about what the Church requires, its about what GOD requires.
- Liet KynesLv 51 decade ago
--Is Catholic--
As I posted in my response to your other question: If you do not believe in what the Catholic Faith says, go in to the Marriage Tribunal, speak your truth, and walk out continuing to believe what you wish to believe. There is not one instance in the whole process where you have to believe what the Church says.
If you believe you were married sacramentaly, THEN SAY THAT. Stand before God and speak to the Catholics that statement. Now are you dating? Are you planning on getting married someday? If you are, then you do not believe that you were married sacramentaly because you are acting as if the bond is broken.
If you truly believe in your heart and before God that you were married sacramentaly, then you must never again date, marry or anything of the sort.
Live out your belief and go to the Catholic Marriage Tribunal and speak what you are living out.
If they grant the annulment, you may accept that you were never sacramentaly married, or you may live as if you were...which means no dating no marriage.
Now is the time to decide what you believe in and act upon it. Christ will help you carry your cross.
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- 1 decade ago
Sorry - but it sounds from your writings that there are some conflicts of doing what's best for him or for you, but really the underlying question - are you willing to let go. Putting all other matters aside, just as a person, you should be asking - are you happy to be rid of it (with or without helping your ex-partner). Do what is right for yourself first (it is not being selfish), and be open about your reservations - if any, to your ex-partner. The other party cannot force you into doing anything you do not wish to.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
You say you don't want to deny him happiness, then don't.
You may not abide by the rules of the RCC, but those are the rules - he has to have a statement of invalidity (annulment). Whether you help him or not is up to you, but he will get one regardless. It is just that your side of the story will not be heard.
Personally, I would help out - it is afterall the Christian thing to do.
- 1 decade ago
It looks like this is an advice question. Are you saying that you divorced your ex husband but now he wants to re marry and is finding that he can't because of that divorce?
- Anonymous1 decade ago
well, what kind of help does he need? Is it some kind of statements the church needs from you? I think, as long as you don't have to tell lies (like you are crazy, so he needs an anullment or something), then I would just do it. Sometimes it is a blessing to have people out of our lives... and if you think he would do the same for you (if you needed something alike) then just go ahead and do it.
- 1 decade ago
first of all Catholicism isn't a religion, it is a movement, Catholics are also christian, they believe the same thing other Christians believe.
And move on and let him get married, you will meet somebody someday. But you won't meet him asking questions on yahoo. Get out there.
- 1 decade ago
After he was the one who divorced you? Personally he could go to hell as far as I care. You don't have anything to do with his happiness, because he will divorce this other person very soon. he doesn't care.