how do i get my soon to be husband to help with the planning......?

Just tell him look i need you're help cause it's you're wedding too. Just not mine and I could use some of you're help.Because I don't want to pick a color that you may not want to have at the wedding.and if that doesn't get him going.Tell him that he will end up wearing a pink tux to the wedding. if he doesn't want to help you plan the wedding. that should get him. best of luck

Girl,let me tell you from experience that your fiance have very different perspectives on this great day. It's your special day. period! He wants to be married to you, and doesn't care what colors the balloons are. For him its an action thing. The act of getting married. For you every detail has to be perfect. Being male, I'm not sure which is the most important part for a woman, the planning, the actual day and how it goes, or remembering and reliving both the planning and the day. I do know that all three are very important. don't take his seemed lack of interest as "he doesn't care about me" or "this isn't important to him". The most important thing to him is that the wedding day is everything you dream it will be (and that as of that day he will be your husband). You plan it how you want it and I promise he'll give input on anything he sees to make it better, but very likely he'll be ecstatic just to be there with you. Don't let this stress you out, it will be the easiest thing you plan for the next fifty years cause he will have an opinion on everything else for the rest of your lives.

Congratulations and good luck

Welcome to the real world. Men are not usually into planning things like weddings or any emotional events. They love to plan stock car races, and where to dig post holes, but weddings? Nuh-uh.

So. This is supposed to be a wedding for the two of you, and you are thinking that at this rate it's just going to be 'your' wedding and he won't have any part in it. Wrong! This is where you use a little finesse. Draw up all the plans for the wedding. Draw up all the plans for an alternate wedding. Then present him with the two sets of plans. Ask him which one he likes best. You'd really be pushing your luck if you gave him three sets of plans, but with two, he'll make a decision and feel proud of himself that he's 'helped' to plan the wedding.

His lack of interest and effort is a BIG RED FLAG.....will he be like this as a husband? Will he show the same disregard for other things that he know are important to you? I would take a step back and ask yourself this.....

He seems to really be opposed to this. Most guys jump at the chance to solve a problem or offer a solution.....

Are you sure he's into being married, or does he just feel obligated to to prove his love for you? Does he see this as a loss of freedom,or dread the responsibility?

He sure is acting like it now.......Don't make any excuses for his behavior. Stop the wedding planning until you se his interest in it. Tell him it won't happen unless he shows in his effort that he wants it to happen.....

You've just got to face the fact that although you've been planning your wedding since your childhood, he hasn't. Ask for his opinion, but don't get too upset with him when he doesn't want to help or doesn't give any input. At least ask him; that way, if he says something later, you can always point out that you asked him and he said he didn't care or it didn't matter or whatever.

Be patient. Good luck and congrats!

He's already told you he thinks this is for the women. So that should tell you that his input is going to be limited.

Tell him you'd appreciate his opinion on certain things. That you think it's important for him to know & understand what's going on....as it is his wedding day, too. Tell him you don't want him to be disppointed. And there are some things you CAN'T do, like choosing the groomsmen. Be choosy what you want his input on.

If he still balks, succumb to the fact that he just isn't going to do it. You can't force him. It'll only make you both, miserable.

Good Luck I planned it. He just didn't care until it came to the music at the wedding the only thing he cared about.

You don't. You take the opportunity to plan your dream wedding and run with it, and thank God that you don't have to argue with him about any of it! lol

My husband was the same way...there were a few things he wanted a certain way, but that was it....it's a guy thing, I think....good luck!

Sit him down and tell him that this is "our" wedding not "my" wedding. I did the same thing with my husband and from then on we planned it together. It is a ceremony that reflects both the bride and groom.

first of all- congratulations! :) secondly- welcome to the trials and tribulations of weddings! you are not alone. i've talked to many many many brides to be and for the most part they say exactly what you're saying: he just isn't interested! i'm going through the same thing myself. i wish i could be of more assistance but i haven't figured it out yet and we're getting married in two months! i've yelled, screamed, cried, berated...and still....not much. for some fiances- that works- for me it worked a little- but not really. I was screaming and yelling every day. Now- i've decided to stop and basically I've given him a few small tasks (pick his tux, pick the music, arrange for the marriage liscence, and arrange for transportation for out of town guests). Everything else i'm doing myself. Good luck! :)