Have you tried the new Jack-in-the-box bodice?

Ladies, I understand that a fashion designer has created just the thing for women who would like to make the acquaintance of eligible bachelors, but have a difficult time finding the proper words for the occasion. The Jack-in-the-box bodice makes talking completely unnecessary.

The bodice is a vest with swinging doors of stiffened fabric, opening much like the shutters on a storm window. When the woman wishes to attract a man, she uses a triggering mechanism (concealed in a hidden pocket) to release a catch, which permits powerful springs to propel the doors suddenly to the wide-open position. The bodice may be worn with, or without, a brassier.

The idea is that your bodice must have come open by accident. You know that isn't true, and so will he, but both of you can pretend otherwise if you so choose, and it's a wonderful ice-breaker. If you've chosen wisely, the nearby gentleman will hasten to your aid, helping you to refasten your bodice again.