Is it left to me to remind my ex about our kids ???

What a prick this guy is, I am sad for you, This is a painful situation, Love for children is unconditional and you look gorgeous, So what is his problem? I don't know the dteails of your situation, but time heals all wounds. You may have to explain to your son that his daddy has gone away and he won't be back. Try to entertain him with fun things and invite his friends around to distract him from thinking about his father. In time his life will mature and he will be emotional programmed to be strong and independant of his father. You sound like a good person/mother so keep being the best mom you can be.

Good luck

I am in a similar situation - although my ex lives across the city. I feel he does not see our son enough. He seems to be more interested in his new relationship than his own child. I stopped making excuses for my ex awhile ago. When my son asks about his Dad I encourage him and ask him if he wants to call but he rarely says yes. My ex will call him almost every night but my son refuses to talk to him. I think that is there way of gaining control over a situation they do not understand. Some guys just don't get it - kids have trouble adjusting to separtation and divorce.

The only thing you can do is keep being the best mom you can be. Be there for your kids when their Dad lets them down but do not make excuses for him. He is the one who will have to deal with that down the road.

To be honest...I understand how you feel.

I mean i just divorced my husband and he used to call the kids all the time before the divorce was final. Now he doesn't even call them period. He likes to go out drinking with all his buddies and his new girlfriend.

I finally met someone that is the best thing that has happened to me. He helps my kids and everything. He is the biggest support that I could ask for. He has taught my son how to ride a bike and plays with my daughter also.

He has been a real big help on me and my kids.

Try having your son write a letter or draw a picture for his dad, and mail it to him. You can tell from what he writes or draws how he's really feeling about not talking to his dad.

You could also put a few pictures of his dad in a small photo album and put it where your son can look at it anytime he wants.

Getting some more positive male influences in his life to fill up his time wouldn't be a bad idea, either...

If your ex husband doesn't want anything to do with your kids its his loss, not theirs or yours.

If you feel that you want to keep the connection alive between them, then forget about how his new girlfriend feels about you, it's got nothing to do with her, it's between her boyfriend (your ex husband) and his kids so tell her to pi$$ off.

Your son doesn't want to talk to his dad on the phone because he feels betrayed and let down by him, if things keep on like this then you ex will realise in years to come that he has missed out on the best years of his kids life and they will decide that they don't want anything to do with him.

Don't feel that your kids need to have a father around, you can be and will be all they will ever need, do what you think is best for your children.

I'm sorry to hear that your children have to deal with this, I pray your Ex comes to his senses before both his children resent and hate him.

I think you need to have a very civil, and respectful conversation with you Ex. And just stick to the facts. The children need more of his attention. It's one thing for them to not see Dad due to the distance, but to not even call daily, send cards, e-mails, etc.....no excuse ( and to add insult to injury he's playing Daddy to this new Heffa's child....OH HELL NO!!), there's way to much technology to help families stay connected. Remind your Ex that he is setting a standard of acceptance for his daughter, she will think it's okay for a father/husband to not call or physically see about his children, and your son will think it's okay to not be at home, spending time with the wife and kids.

I know you wanna rip him a new one.....cause I do just reading your question/testimony, but try to be as calm and civil as possible......and it wouldn't hurt to have this conversation in person....looking like a SUPER STAR.....you know, just to make him remember what he L-O-S-T!

Good luck.

You should just let it go. It's terrible. It's so true the saying any man can be a father but it takes a true MAN to be a Dad. He is the one that is losing out on those precious children. You can't make him do anything. He is a terrible person anyway. He obviously doesn't want to be involved. Let him stew in his misery. One day he'll wake up and realize what a screw up he is. And maybe it won't be too late.

I understand how you feel, it just hurts so much to see the kid asking for a dad that you know he has, but that he doesn't care...

man are so stupid...

but that's another subject...

just be there for your kids, ignore the fact they have a father because they really don't, and love them everyday more and more....

they're kids right now, but they'll grow up and eventually they'll understand what a great woman you are.

Hun,

Keep moving forward its not for you to push or urge someone into a responsibility that one has left.

They must make their own choice when it comes to what they have created.

Keep being the best mom and dad you can., and be weary of him coming back when he becomes tired of the woman he is currently with.

Yes, is up to you. Do it for your kids, they deserve to have a father, and, let's face it, men won't do it unless they are reminded to do so.

Call him at work. tell him that this is not about you cand him but about the kids. Tell him that they ask about him and that you don;t kow what to say. Tell him that they would like to hear from him from time to time.

His new woman should understand that the kids exist and that they need their daddy too.

I'm sorry that you are in this situation.

Good luck