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how do i get my husband to spend more time with me?

we've been together for almost five years. we used to always spend time together. now it's like we are just roommates. we have five kids together, so i'm pretty realistic with how much time we can spend together. but i think if he can find time to go play golf and poker and shoot pool with his buddies five nights out of the week, why can't he find time for me?

12 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    I think you both need to find time where you can go out to dinner at least once a week. Also sit down and talk with him about your concerns. Don't yell, just sit down and tell him about your concerns. Let him know that you want to spend more quality time with him. Let him know that you feel like your being pushed aside for his golf, poker and pool with his friends. And you want some of his time too.

    Hope that this helps. Take care and God Bless

  • 1 decade ago

    You need to get a babysitter and go out on the town once in awhile

    or if you have family who could look after them plan a romantic getaway. Your husband maybe can't deal with work then coming home to five screaming kids he is just reducing stress hanging out with his buddies out of the house. But really what is he doing if he loves you he should find a way to incorporate you on these nights unless he is up to no good?

  • 1 decade ago

    Maybe your attention towards him is not as crazy as it used to be 4-5 years ago, so try to be as you were 5 years back when you got together.think of the things which made him happy and do what he used to like.

    The other factor can be you might had not maintained yourself.A hubby always wants his wife to look as gorgegous as she looked on the wedding day. So try to wear and dress up in such a manner that he founds you attractive. If he likes to do naughty things or talk dirty stuff, do that to him.

    Once he gained interest in you, i bet ya he will start giving you more time than anything else.

  • 1 decade ago

    Try to sit down and discuss your concerns with him. Or, you could set aside one Friday a month to go out for a few hours alone. You could go to a movie or out to eat or just spend time at the park or mall.

    You basically need to find quality time together if you have 5 kids.

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  • 1 decade ago

    Well, do you want play nice or play dirty? I would start by taking time for yourself. Then find yourself ways to incorporate your husband back into your life. Make sure you make yourself look your best. Pay attention to details, nice clothes, good repair, ect. Make sure to do your hair and nails, take good care of your body.

    Get a cheak up. Dental details all that. Talk to him tell him how you feel and let him have time to reply, do this calmly.

    If that doesn't work then find yourslef a very sexy "friend" to hang put with. Be sure not to let the kids into the mix of seeing you with your jelousy-bait but be sure your husband knows. You'll find he starts to notice.

  • Me
    Lv 6
    1 decade ago

    sure you did spend so much time together... 5 years of marriage and 5 kids ;)

    I was kidding, but I guess you have to find some time for yourself first, I bet you do not get any time to take care of you, find someone to help you with kids once a week and for the first week, you spend all that time with you, go shopping, hair cut, makeup and .... do a make over for you self.

    and then try to find something that you 2 enjoy and do ask him to do it with you, go to movie or....

    if he did not want to do it, talk to him and let him know how much you miss him and ...

    later by later you can get more time with him, if he start having fun with you ...

    good luck

  • 1 decade ago

    Girl, start dressing sexy and pretend as if you dont give a damn about him! Believe me, the tables will turn really quick. He'll start calling you, wanting to take you out and showing affection, at this point he would'nt want anyone else to have you. So he will start showing you some attention and spending alot more time with you. Go for it! Good Luck!

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Girl get real.

    You have the fur lined triangular monster, and a set of knockers working in your behalf.

    You better start working that thing to keep him from running off.

    If you are offering up the goodies and that is not working, you may be in trouble.

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    i agree with steph....

    dont act like a sad puppy either- just stand up for yourself...

    make plans like a week in advance... and hell soon get used to it

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    Why can't YOU find the time to COMMUNICATE this to HIM?

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