Do actors in soft core porn really have sex?

It really depends on the nature of the production and the performers involved. With the right scene selection and editing, a hardcore production could be presented in such a way as to merit a 'softcore' rating. Likewise, the performance may seem realistic but is actually the product of acting and editing. When all is said and done, the two goals of softcore porn is to make you think it's real and make it safely past the censors...

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There have been several instances when the actors have had sex when they shouldn't have. Often they end up getting married for a little while.

Yes, that's why it's called Soft Core Porn.

It's the same thing, only not as raunchy.