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What do you think about my poem?

Update:

There are days when someone says something unpleasant to you causing the event to ruin your day.

Laughter is a very powerful tool

This kind of skill can be crafted

Without a person having to go to school

You just lift up my spirits

and the wound is mended.

I can tell you have a good heart

by using your gift wisely

you are very smart

Keep letting your inner joy grow

Who knows what it could bestow?

I think you already know.

There are times when my eyes would come to tears

You came along with your silly self

and it would all disappear

I could stop

but I don't want your heart to drop

I'll save the rest for chapter two

Update 2:

You can use it, but make sure you tell them Rachelle Dorleans wrote it

If you have any contacts, give me a hollar.

6 Answers

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  • 1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    That was good. But to give constructive criticism, the lines didn't really flow together very well. Try making two sentences that add on to each other then adding on to that subject.

    Source(s): My own poetry
  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    This poem is an inspirational piece, very expressive. If someone needed to feel a little relief reading this poem probably would help that person smile.

  • Ralph
    Lv 7
    1 decade ago

    It’s nice and uplifting but a bit clunky. You need to study your poetry formats...

  • 1 decade ago

    jars a bit, does not flow well together.....tenses and mood are at war with each other...they scratch and bleed all over.

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  • 1 decade ago

    thats a real good poem

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    thats beautiful may i use it for a certain sum1 i know?

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