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Anonymous
Anonymous asked in Family & RelationshipsMarriage & Divorce · 1 decade ago

How do you tell your husband that you love him but you hate having sex with him ?

My sisters husband is sleeping around with his co-workers but she really doesn't want to have sex with him because he isn't doing it for her any more when they are haveing sex she doesn't feeel anything but she loves him and don't want to lose him but how can she tell him that she loves him but she can't have sex with him because he can't last as long as he use to

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  • Ande
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago
    Favorite Answer

    She "won't" have sex with him. Shame on her. If she loves him she'll help him to learn some self control. It's up to both people to help the guy if he has trouble with a hair trigger.

    Sometimes when men have been masturbating a lot or get overly excited things just happen too fast. This could be a really simple fix. Such as him masturbating an hour or two before he gets together with her.

    And he has no excuse. People do not sleep around just because they aren't getting it as home. Sorry - wrong answer. They sleep around for the fantasy. They do it because they can't deal with reality. What is his reality?

    If you ask me both your friend and her husband have issues to deal with. Both need to take responsibility for their part in the marriage going south.

    As for how she tells him, how bout honesty? I would however address it as a concern that she believes can be dealt with rather than as one she sees as hopeless. Men have fragile egos.

    If your friends want to keep their marriage together, they will. If both are so immature as to deny sex due to a little dysfunction or sleep around then both are doomed to failure. It's up to them to take the reigns and deal with it or give up. Just hope they do something soon before there is nothing left to repair.

  • 1 decade ago

    I think she should just sit and talk to him and tell him how she feels.. I think she should know that he is sleeping around and really and truthfully if you cant stand to have sex with the person should you really be married in the first place. I know that sex isn't all a marriage is about but to a man that is not true. I think they both need to sit and talk and maybe attend counseling together.

  • 1 decade ago

    Ummmmmm if he's sleeping with co-workers i think he already has a pretty damn good idea that she doesnt want to have sex with him.. or he probably wouldnt be messing around in the first place.. i think she has bigger issues , and needs to focus on the fact that hes cheating more then the fact of telling him she doesnt want to have sex with him..

  • avechm
    Lv 4
    1 decade ago

    Well, of course, she doesn't want to have sex with him if he is sleeping around??? What kinda love is that??? Why does she love him then???

    Sounds like just a friend to me???

    And she can't have sex with him because he can't last as long as he used to??? What kind of love is that???

    Both of those people need to wake up!

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  • 1 decade ago

    well maybe she hates having sex with him because he is sleeping around with co-workers you think? If I were her and she knows he,s having sex,I would just come right out and tell him how I feel and then tell him that she knows about his having sex with all his co-workers...

  • 1 decade ago

    You should firgure out something that you both like and to express your love for each other with out sexual intercourse. Or maybe you guys can sit down and talk about what you both would like to happen in the bed. Simple as that.

  • 1 decade ago

    Just be honest and talk with him and tell him how you feel and why... You need to talk to a doctor with him and get him on some medication and help for his problem and you need to love him where he is at... If he is cheating she needs to leave him anyways.

  • 1 decade ago

    Your sister suffers from CONDITIONAL LOVE. Its supposed to be "in sickness and in health" He may not last as long as he used to but I am sure there are things she can no longer do that she used to.

  • 1 decade ago

    OMG, how horrible He is messing around on her and she is worried about telling him she doesnt wanna do it with him? Come on, this is a relationship that is in the toilet and need to be divorced.

    Why would she want to be with a man who messes around on her?

  • Anonymous
    1 decade ago

    in my opinion she's already lost him. he doesnt want her if he's choosing other women over her constantly. i think it would be a good thing because hello- divorce is frowned upon but according to the bible- infidelity is our only way out hallelujah tell her to dump that sucker for someone that just wants to be with her!

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