I think I may be borderline for antisocial personality disorder...?

Do you have remorse? Do you have a level of empathy for others? You mentioned holding back at a mosh pit - were you doing that because you worried about hurting someone or because you were more worried about consequence?

Antisocial Personality Disorder is classified by a few criteria. The most common one is not being able to feel for anyone else or an extreme disregard for other people's feelings and freedoms. If you wanted something, would you kill someone in your way? Or manipulate them with no thought of them? (antisocial personality can come in "sub criminal" classifications too).

If you feel that you have no remorse and no regard for others - that's a likelyhood of antisocial personality disorder - it affects 4% of the population, 3% males, 1% females. However - because you worry about having it - that's a contraindication that you have antisocial personality disorder. Most people with it do not consider they have a problem. Most antisocial people think that everyone else thinks the same way they do and often can't understand simple things like altruism. If you've ever given someone something without expecting to gain from it, that's another contraindication.

If you've got an impulse to break stuff and do things you find distasteful - with accompanied compulsive behaviour (as you mention later), chances are you may have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder. A desire to do something that you're not really wanting to do is the defining characteristic of OCD. OCD affects 2% of the population but most people don't really know about the obsessive side (pervasive, unwanted thoughts or images) they just see the constant hand washing or whatever and think that's the problem - it's not, that's a coping mechanism.

If you just want to break stuff - you may have some level of anger issue or possibly a form of mood disorder. Breaking stuff can be very catharthic and may be a release from stress.

In any case, if you're really worried, see a mental health professional and get assessed. However, to allay your fears, the sheer action of asking for help about it probably means you don't have Antisocial Personality Disorder. :)

Until this person is ready to accept that there is a problem, there is nothing that you can do. They will not do well in treatment if they feel that nothing is wrong. The only way that you can 'force' the issue is if he is under 18 and you are his parent or guardian or he is a danger to himself or others. Unfortunately, mental health is a difficult area to treat. The person has to be willing to seek treatment in order for it to succeed. If there are others who feel the same way that you do, then you could have an intervention. I must strongly warn you though; this would be different than an intervention for someone with an abuse problem. You cannot force the issue with someone with mental health issues. The stress can cause them to have a set back and cause their symptoms to become worse. If he becomes agitated, you need to stop immediately. I would also not do an intervention if it is just you or with more than 4-5 people. If it is just you, he will feel betrayed by you. A large group will make him feel ganged up on -- like everyone is out to get him. These can both cause symptoms to occur. I wish you the best of luck.

I just noticed this question.. a couple hours late.. but I am sure you will see the reply at some point..

There are a few important things to take from the answers given.. it is great that you can admit to yourself that something is not right.. and it is healthy that you want to get some help with this.. that is often the hardest part, getting over the denail of it all.

You should definitly find a qualified professional in a mental health capacity to help you understand this a little better.. get a referral to a psychologist if you can. It is very true that you can't self-diagnose any mental disorder or affliction, but that certainly does not mean you should not look into them and get a better understanding of how you feel. With research comes knowledge.. and you will be able to rule out some of the things that will come up in the questions that obviously don't fit into your mental profile.

Nobody knows you better than you.

I have no idea what the problem or solution for it might be.. psychotherapy, medication.. hypnosis..? But, until you can figure out what it is in your past that is still haunting you and can rationally deal with those pent up emotions, you are going to have a difficult time of fully accepting things for what they are and moving forward.

To get rid of the emotional deadness.. you have to work yourself through it all .. and it sucks. It is painful, and you will doubt yourself and everything you think you might believe in. But mental freedom is hiding at the end of that tunnel. Impulsive thoughts and actions can be dangerous to your self and everyone around you. A mental health professional can help you to turn your impulseivity into rationality and help you be able to cope with your emotions in a healthy way. You have to do all that you can to help this happen.. eat a balanced diet, exercize, sleep well, and work towards minimizing the amount of stress in your life. It doesn't take much for the body and mind to be thrown off balance.. and sometimes all it takes to get things right again is a few changes in lifestyle.. and if that isn't enough, at least it will make the medical side of things much easier to figure out.

I lived a life of madness for a long, long time with acting impulsively and hurting everyone in my life that was stupid enough to get too close. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder almost 15 years ago and had a very bad 5 years of trying to figure it all out.. drug abuse, jail, suicide attempts, divorce, a couple weeks in a mental hospital (twice) .. and about 30 changes in medications later, I can finally say I have been doing very well the last couple years. I am not going to sit here and say that I am cured and life is good.. but there is hope .. you just have to find courage in yourself to get through things. Here's a link for you to see what is out there..

http://www.nimh.nih.gov/healthinformation/index.cf...

Sorry this ended up so long, Good Luck with it :)

Send me a message if you ever want to talk about things, I will reply with my IM screen name

Sounds like counseling would be the logical and most beneficial first step. There are a lot of different components to both of the disorders you mentioned and they are both very complex. Staying in control is something I would think anyone would want. Get into counseling and talk your problems out with someone who cares! That is one way to feel emotionally alive because repression never yields good results... best of luck to you!

I had a pretty rough life myself-sometimes it makes you a stronger person. I'm not you so I'm not trying to underestimate what you feel--I'm just giving my take on it. The more I believe a person focuses on their inadequacies-the more they are brought to the front of their mind and become more focused on. I don't know what your desires are--are you sure they are really that horrible? People are the hardest on themselves usually . I believe in prayer-some people don't- but I really did overcome some desires through prayer--There is a book that I found alot of answers/comfort in--"Living A Life That Matters" by Harold S. Kushner. I listened to it from the public library --on tape --it made me feel like my life was worth something. I went to the bookstore and had them order it for me.

What desires? To isolate yourself? To hurt someone? Get counseling. You really can't just ignore your underlying issues and expect to be able to stay in control. You need assistance in working out those problems. Especially since you don't talk about that bad childhood. It sounds like you already know waht your issues are...bad childhood, so find someone to help you figure out how to deal with it and live your life now. Good Luck to you. I think that you can find the treatments you need and feel emotionally alive with some good psychiatric help.

Do not, I repeat DO NOT self diagnose your mental condition. Seek out a qualified professional or two or more if you have to, until you find one that you are comfortable with and you can open up to. Be wary of anyone who gives you a snap diagnosis in a short time. There can be many factors causing you to feel the way you do.

It would seem this is from a mental illness standpoint and not an M.H. standpoint. Staying in control is important of course. Your social skills will change and improve as you find the social groups that you fit into. Mental health or social interactivity as I call it depends on taking orders from your group. Accept the group orders and be happy .

stop trying to diagnose yourself and see a professional.

you can't solve the problem with your mind when the problem is the mind itself.

Check this site:

http://www.4degreez.com/misc/personality_disorder_...