What should i do about jealous in-laws?

Question

My husband and i have been married for about 2 years, we have a son that is 17 months old and is the first grandchild on both sides. My mother and father in law both work different shifts. Their shifts change weekly so when one is working graveyard the other is working days. However, my parents work Monday through Friday 8-4:30 and off on the weekends. My mother also has to take my son to daycare and me to work daily until i can afford to get a new transmission in my car.  My mother-in-law tends to get jealous of the time that my son spends with my parents. She doesn't see my son as much as they do but it is because my mother takes me to work every single day and because of the shifts that she and her husband work. She comes off like the victim in this situation and tries to act like i am trying to keep my son from her. I have not. But she waits until the last minute to contact me when she wants to keep him and by then i have already made plans. I've tried talking to her, now what?

littlecraps · Accepted Answer

Tell her to have her own baby!!

Dovahkiin · Answer

Now that youve done all you can you let it be her problem. She is being very unreasonable to the point of ridiculous. She wants you to bend to her will. 
Just let it go and if she wants to complain tell her youve explained to her already how to get time with him and all she has to do is make plans ahead of time...then say you have things to do and say goodbye. Dont let her jealousy become your problem


I have grandchildren who live across the other side of the country. I see them about once a year for a few weeks. I thank God they have another grandparent that lives very close by they can see often. Im not the least bit jealous because I have my grandchildrens best interest in my heart. But you are dealing with a self centered person who thinks of herself only.

proud grandma · Answer

As a MIL that lives 1 hr from my son and his family I can kind of relate.  Her family lives 2 miles away and they spend every weekend together.  My  DIL is very much still attached to her Mother's umbilical cord.  Yes, it really hurts us that we don't get to spend nearly as much time with our precious  grand daughter as they do.

I know how very much it would mean to me if my DIL called and ASKED me when  would be  a good time for  my grand daughter to come visit us.  That doesn't stop me from extending invitations to try and  get together.  It just would be nice if they took the initiative to nurture the relationship between grandchild and grandparent.   I know when I was growing up my parents and my husband's parents always made sure our grandparents had relationships with us.  Isn't that part of parenting?     Why is everyone so fast to place blame on the MIL?

Please for your  in-law's  sake and your child's don't play favorites and try and make things as easy as possible for them to see their grandchild.

*huge sigh* · Answer

If you've tried talking to her and nothing came of it, there's nothing else you can do. Just keep reminding yourself that she's the one who's being unreasonable, and that you're not doing anything wrong.

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What should i do about jealous in-laws?

4 Answers