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Is there really a way to deal with your mates baggage?
She's a drug addict
She's paranoid
She's threatened by me because I'm a better person and a better mother to even her own child than her
She's hot/cold as often as someone changes their clothes
Anger issues
violence issues
insecure
moves every few months
fraudulently obtains welfare
not afraid at all of breaking the law...hasnt really gotten caught yet
It's hideous isnt it? To make matters worse she threatens my family on a regular basis. She's vendictive...she cannot even handle having a conversation unless she's in a depressive mode....then she cries on my shoulder. sick.
Any good ideas on how to handle her? I'm not looking for aggressive, violent ways. I'm half her size plus I dont want trouble...just want to somehow stifle her violent behavior and have her leave us alone.
oh and my guy and her have to at least talk since they have a mutual child.
My guy does handle things. She has physically assaulted me when I was prego. She has no idea of consequence. They do only talk with regards to the child, however she is trying to steal the child right now. I've absolutely tried to get her help...called shelters, drug rehab centers & even took care of her child while she was suppose to be getting "better"... I believe all her brain cells are damaged and she has no ability to get better or make good decisions for herself let alone the child.
9 Answers
- Just GLv 41 decade agoFavorite Answer
It would be in your best interest to be as helpful as possible to the mother of your boyfriends kid. If you truly think you are a better person than she is ,the best thing to do this is to help her get the care she needs.
That child will appreciate that much more than anything else you can provide. It might be that she is beyond help, but you should make the best possible effort and take it from there. I think you will soon begin to realize that there are always two sides to a story and perhaps you will also realize that what appears to be one thing is usually a distortion of someone else's opinion of that person.
Good Luck!
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Have your guy only talk to her when its about the children other than that theres no need to speak or even be friends, being civil is enough, dont invite stress and drama into your life. Kill her with kindness say hi, hello, good morning good afternoon, keep it only into common courtisies. My hubbies wife is a bad mother but they have two children from their marriage, she doesnt like me and when she does speak its phoney I think shes bipolar, anyway we only speak of the children, their needs etc Child Protective services has been called on her, she tried to take it out on us, I answered her how sad for the children, i never show any feeling or concern towards her, just the children neither does my hubby when she has all these diff boyfriends adn break ups we either ignore her or make a very cold statment like above mentioned. She got the picture, when you keep doing it and are consistent she'll get the picture
- Anonymous1 decade ago
YOU AND YOUR MATE ARE A PIECE OF WORK TOO! DOES YOUR MATE HAVE CUSTODY OF THE CHILD? IF NOT, HE SHOULD GET THE CHILD ASAP! With that said, if he does have the child, there is no reason to 'ever' deal with her. I would even get a restraining order against her, due to the fact that she is a drug abuser and disruptive to the mental welfare of her child. So, let her nag and moan. Move, get lost so that she can moan alone. DIVORCE YOURSELVES FROM HER EXISTENCE. She can't bother you if she does not know where you are.
Immediately, do not answer her calls or the door. Tell your family not to talk to her at all. Call the police on the restraining order EVERY TIME SHE SHOWS UP!
- 1 decade ago
You should really break up. It seems like you guys aren't right for each other. But, if you want to have to get her to talk to you, and not as you say. Let her know exactly how you feel, and maybe she will change or at least try to change, if she doesn't respect this, then you definitely need to stop making her a priority if you are just an option.
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- 1 decade ago
Your guy should be dealing with his x.
You can't stop her from seeing her child but you can make her deal your guy instead. He needs to man up and deal with his psycho wife. You should insist he does. He knows how, he is the one that was with her before and I am sure her behavior is nothing new. Forget about what she does with welfare and other things that irritate you. Just have Hubby deal with it. Just say just a minute, and hand the phone to him.
- 5 years ago
in the adventure that your searching for a real relationship then you certainly would desire to be with some person who's prepared that can assist you you recover from your problems and fears no longer some person who will basically push them to the area and forget approximately approximately then because of the fact your appealing... because of the fact no longer basically is bags a foul element for a relationship its additionally a terrible to element to be lugging around with you each and every and all the time... And plus basically pushing bags off to the area can destroy some truly stable relationships...
- Anonymous1 decade ago
i know what you are going through for i am too. have been for 15 years but don't let her get too you cause that is what she wants sounds too me she is jealous of you. try talking too her good luck
- Anonymous1 decade ago
WTF?