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fresh start?
why must you control me,
tell me what to do,
You say do this, do that,
well why don't you?
I just want to live my own life,
why won't you let me?
worry about yourself,
and just let me be!
everything i do is wrong,
i can't do anything right,
just leave me alone!
get out of my sight.
I'm tired of living like this,
i can't wait to depart,
soon i'll be out of you hands,
and i'll get a fresh start.
it's a first write, so it needs a little work.
but thought i post it anyways.
7 Answers
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
Glad your back Kara. Write whats in your heart. Don't let anyone influence the way you write.
- 1 decade ago
Add a chorus with a punch, put it to music, and you would have every angry teen in the English speaking world singing it. It hits the nail right on the head.
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Check Last stanza:
3rd line: "soon i'll be out of your* hands"
Great poem. I like it. Maybe ty to make it ryhm a bit more but if you don't wanna, that's fine. I like this poem. Good job ;)
- DinosaurLv 41 decade ago
I like it. You describe your longing to be free very well, it reminds me of the song "Free Bird" by Lynard Skynard (which is one of my favorite songs) Good job, it's a little rough, but like you said it's a first write, so that's understandable.
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- Anonymous1 decade ago
I can relate to this poem so much. I love it. Needs a little work but other than that its an awesome poem. Keep it up
- some oneLv 51 decade ago
you have great ideas , but you did not apply them very well. but yes, fresh start.
