Would you like to join me in THANKING ex President Bill Clinton?

Dear Mr. Ex President Clinton:

I recently saw a bumper sticker that said, "Thank me, I voted for

Clinton-Gore." So, I sat down and reflected on that, and I am sending my

"Thank you" for what you have done, specifically:

1. Thank you for introducing us to Jennifer Flowers, Paula Jones, Monica

Lewinsky, Dolly Kyle Browning, Kathleen Willey, and Juanita Broderick. Did I

leave anyone out?

2. Thank you for teaching my 8 year old about oral sex. I had really planned

to wait until they were older to discuss it with them, but now they know more

about it than I did as a senior in college.

3. Thank you for showing us that sexual harassment in the work place

(especially the White House) and on the job is OK, and all you have to know

is what the meaning of "is" is. It really is great to know that certain

sexual acts are not sex, and one person may have sex while the other one

involved does NOT have sex.

4. Thank you for reintroducing the concept of impeachment to a new generation

and demonstrating that the ridiculous plot of the movie "Wag the Dog" could

be plausible after all.

5. Thanks for making Jimmy Carter look competent, Gerald Ford look graceful,

Richard Nixon look honest, Lyndon Johnson look truthful, and John Kennedy

look moral.

6. Thank you for the 73 House and Senate witnesses who have pled the 5th

Amendment and 17 witnesses who have fled the country to avoid testifying

about Democratic campaign fund raising.

7. Thank you, for the 19 charges, 8 convictions, and 4 imprisonments from the

Whitewater "mess" and the 55 criminal charges and 32 criminal convictions (so

far) in the other "Clinton" scandals.

8. Thanks also for reducing our military by half, "gutting" much of our

foreign policy, and flying all over the world on "vacations" carefully

disguised as necessary trips.

9. Thank you, also, for "finding" millions of dollars--- I really didn't need

it in the first place,

and I can't think of a more well deserving group of recipients for my

hard-earned dollars than jet fuel for all of your globe-trotting. I

understand you, the family and your cronies have logged in more time aboard

Air Force One than any other administration.

10. Now that you've left the White House, thanks for the 140 pardons of

convicted felons and indicted felons-in-exile. We will love to have them

rejoin society.

11. Thanks also for removing the White House silverware. I'm sure that Laura

Bush didn't! like the pattern anyway. Also, enjoy the housewarming gifts

you've received from your "friends."

12. Thanks to you and your staff in the West Wing of the White House for

vandalizing and destroying government property on the way out. I also

appreciate removing all of that excess weight (China, silverware, linen,

towels, ash trays, soap, pens, magnetic compass, flight manuals, etc.) out of

Air Force 1. The weight savings means burning less fuel, thus less tax

dollars spent on jet fuel. Thank you!

13. And finally, please ensure that Hillary enjoys the $8 million dollar

advance for her upcoming "tell-all" book and you, Bill, the $10 million

advance for your memoirs. Who says crime doesn't pay!

14. The last and most important point - thank you for forcing Israel to let

Mohammed Atta go free. Terrorist pilot Mohammed Atta blew up a bus in Israel

in 1986. The Israelis captured, tried and imprisoned him. As part of the Oslo

agreement with the Palestinians in 1993, Israel had to agree to release

so-called "political prisoners".

However, the Israelis would not release any with blood on their hands. The

American President at the time, Bill Clinton, and his Secretary of State,

Warren Christopher, "insisted" that all prisoners be released. Thus Mohammed

Atta was freed and eventually thanked the US by flying an airplane into Tower

One of the World Trade Center. This was reported by many of the American TV

networks at the time that the terrorists were first identified.

It was censored in the US from all later reports. Why shouldn't Americans

know the real truth?

What a guy!!

SINCERELY,

A US Citizen

PS. Please pass along a special thank you to Al Gore for "inventing" the

Internet, without which I would not be able to post this wonderful factual

blog.