Egyptian friends , tell me the most funny joke you have !?

fi wa7da barda lesa gayaly enhrda :

مذيعه بتسال صاحب مزرعه بقر انت بتاكل البقر ايه قال لها

اي واحده انا عندي 2 بقره واحده بيضا و واحده احمر

فقالت البيضا قال باكلها برسيم قالت طيب و الحمرا قال

باكلها برسيم

قالت طيب انت بتنيمهم فين قال اي واحده البيضا ولا

الحمرا

قالت البيضا

قال في الزريبه

قالت طيب و الحمرا

قال في الزريبه

قالت بترعي بيهم فين

قال اي واحده البيضاولا الحمرا

قالت البيضا

قال حول المزرعه

قالت طيب و الحمرا

قال حول المزرعه

قالت له انا كل ما اسالك علي اي حاجه بتقول نفس الاجابه

للاثنين ليه بتفرق ابيض و احمر

قال اصل البيضا بتعتي

قالت طيب و الحمرا

قال بتعتي برضه

The Israeli Way...?

What happens if an insect falls in a cup of coffee?

The British : will throw the cup into the street and leave the coffee shop for good.

The American : will get the insect out and drink the coffee.

The Chinese: will eat the insect and drink the coffee.

The Israeli will :

(1) Sell the coffee to the American and the insect to the Chinese.

(2) Cry on all media channels that he feels insecure.

(3) Accuse the Palestinians, Hizb Allah, Syria and Iran of using germ-weapons.

(4) Keep on crying about anti-semitism and violations of human rights.

(5) Ask the Palestinian President to stop planting insects in the cups

of coffee.

(6) Re-occupy the West Bank, Gaza Strip.

(7) Demolish houses, confiscate lands, cut water and electrity from

Palestinian houses and randomly shoot Palestinians.

(8) Ask the United States for urgent military support and a loan of one million dollars inorder to buy a new cup of coffee.

(9) Ask the United Nations to punish the coffee-shop

EDIT : thanx gigi & egypty .... any how im not waiting for the best answer i just found it funny and wanted to share it with u

مرة واحدة راحت تشتري عسل لما رجعت البيت شافت في العسل شعرة راحت للراجل قلتله ايه الشعرة ديه قلها يمكن وقعت من راسك قلتله فشردانا قرعة

@ last pharoah

O0Ooch!!!lol.........i gave u a thumbs up by the way

@7oka

keda ya 7oka betehregna ye3ny ???mashy mashy

ana 3'eltan 3al star ely edet7alek :(

an italian family immigrated to america. they had a little daughter who was brought up as a good catholic by her good parents, when the girl became 16, she wanted to go out with her boyfriend like other girls. her father insisted that he would give her advice before allowing her to do so.

he told her, dear girl, you must be cautious because i know what happens to girls like you when they go out with boys. now this is what happens, you wil ll go to the movie, after the movie, he will ask you to have a walk in the park. you will walk together, till suddenly, in a dark corner, he take your honor and your family's honor for ever.

the girl thanked her father and went out with her boyfriend.

after midnight, the girl went home and cheerfully kissed her father. she told him, thanks a lot for warning me as you did. he invited me for a walk after the movie. when we went to a dark corner, i remembered every word you told me, so i decided to TAKE HIS HONOR ANDTHE HONOR OF HIS FAMILY FOR GOOD.

tweety egypt belive me the first one, 4th one and 5th one were sooooooooooo funny.

Ana sa5sa5t 3ala ro7y men el de7k lama arethom.

@Eman g your joke is reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy good too.

I'll add some later

i cant say anything after last pharoh

choose him as best answer

مرة واحد حب يجري يجري ما حبوش

مرة اتنين ماشين مع بعض بيتخانقوا علي يقف في النص

مرةاتنين راكبين موتوسيكل بيتخانقوا مين يعد جمب الشباك

مرة عمارتين وقعوا على بعض بعض مات

مرة واحد راح خان الخليلي الخليلي قتله

i know i am a looser and these are silly jokes