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Why am I doing this? A guy i have been seening seems so nice at times.?
I just can't help but think that he is BSing me. I am not sure if it is because I was deceived after a 12 year relationship, or what. I feel so insecure and even jealous. I hate insecurity and jealousy, and have never been this way before. I am always looking for him to deceive me. I guess what I need is to know is if I should just fully trust him, or continue to be suspicious. We live an hour apart, and I realize that long distance relationships are hard, but that isn't very far. He always tells me that he loves me, and talks about us eventually moving in together. Am I being unfair? Am I just to fragile right now to have a relationship with anyone right now?
It has been almost two years since the split, and I have not gotten involved with anyone else since. I would really love to have someone by my side. I am very attracted to him both physically and mentally. By the way, he is 9 years younger than me, but neither of us are really young, and I look young for my age.
I have talked to him, and he seems almost too understanding about it.
2 Answers
- ♥bigmamma♥Lv 61 decade agoFavorite Answer
12 years is a long time! It happened to me after 14 (well 12 actually, but he led me on for an additional 2 years) and I found that it took a LONG time being in a new relationship before I could trust someone again! My boyfriend (now husband) was very understanding about it as well & we also talked about moving in together for a while. I was afraid to move in with him because I was afraid he would just make me leave as my ex did & I didn't want to go through it again. I moved my stuff in little by little. First just some clothes & a toothbrush, then some other little things, then after a while I finally got up the nerve to move in the big stuff! Just take your time & give him a chance. It is unfair to assume he will cheat just because your ex did, but it's hard not to feel that way & to trust someone enough to give your heart again. But it's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. Okay, that was corny, but you know what I mean....
- 1 decade ago
Talk to him. tell him how you feel. Communication is the best approach. If he really cares about you, he will help you. : )
What does he say?
