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How to get an adolescent to open up and talk about sexual abuse?
My cousin, I believe is being sexually abused by my aunt's on again, off again, live in, boyfriend! It has been brought to my attention through another family member and as she told me what she knew and what she thought was happening, peices to a puzzle long unsolved came together at last! my cousin has been withdrawn, she won't talk to anyone, and she won't come out and bluntly say whether she has or hasn't been sexually abused!! The family member asked her if my aunt's boyfriend has ever sexually abused her and my cousin said that if she told this family member that my cousin's dad would go to jail. Which we take to mean, that if she told and said the truth which is "yes" that she is afraid her dad will kill him and go to jail. How do I get her past all these fears and get her to tell me the truth! How do I get her to open up and talk to me honestly?!! I can't leave her in this situation. I believe she has told her mother, but her mother is literally in need of mental help...
and we believe that my cousin has told her mother and her mother confronted the her boyfriend and she believed the boyfriend!! I know my aunt is sick and twisted!! But I can't prove nothing unless my cousin opens up and talks to me!! How do I get her to talk without scaring her off or seem threatning to her mother who although she knows is crazy, she loves dearly!?
1 Answer
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
the female who your cousin trusts the most has to be the one to talk to her. A female case worker from child and family services should be present as well to be there for safety.
you have to explain to your cousin that she'll be protected and the case worker/authority figure will have to explain that they will protect her father and make sure he doesn't go to jail because they won't allow anything to happen.
What's most important is that she feels safe and trust is established. She needs to be reassured that it's not her fault and she needs to stand up for all the other girls who this might happen to in the future
after all this they usually crack by making her weigh her conscience on the fact that she'll feel responsible if this happens to somebody else because she didn't say anything. by standing up for herself nobody else including herself needs to suffer anymore. she also knows her mother has issues and will need some reassurance that her mother will get help.
good luck and i hope that this pervert gets brought to justice
