Yahoo Answers is shutting down on May 4th, 2021 (Eastern Time) and beginning April 20th, 2021 (Eastern Time) the Yahoo Answers website will be in read-only mode. There will be no changes to other Yahoo properties or services, or your Yahoo account. You can find more information about the Yahoo Answers shutdown and how to download your data on this help page.
Trending News
What would you do or do differently in this situation?
I've had a close friend for 30 years. We met as toddlers, our families knew eachother and are friendly. We considered the other's family as our own. I always tried to keep in contact by email/phone but sometimes forget birthdays (even my mom's), and I've gone out of my way to visit her when I can. She, on the other hand, never calls or responds to emails, has only visited twice while on the way to somewhere more exciting, but does send b-day cards. She seems to think that sending b-day cards makes her a better friend. About two years ago I moved much farther away and made a quick trip home to visit . I knew she wouldn't be able to come to town b/c she was busy. Halfway through the weekend, I found out she was there and chose to avoid me b/c she didn't have time. I was hurt. I have chosen to end the friendship but am feeling pressure from family. I fear my next trip home because I think they're trying to plan an "accidental" meeting.
What would you do?
1) I'm not sure what *I* would need to appologize for since I haven't done anything wrong.
2) The families are friendly (not best friends) because we were friends.
3) I'm not declaring an end to the friendship; I'm simply stopping my previous communications with her (email and phone calls). Since I am the one who was consistent in keeping contact with little reciprocation from her, I think it is obvious what I am doing without actually saying, "Our friendship is over."
4) She seems quite hurt that I would stop communicating even though she never bothered to reply or pick up the phone herself.
7 Answers
- 1 decade agoFavorite Answer
go with your gut instinct
if they plan an "accidental" meeting then just take it from there and express your feelings there
- 1 decade ago
Friends accept each other for who they are and don't try to change one another. Leave your friendship the way it has always been and the way that it probably will always be. Accept that she is different than you and on the same note vice/versa. If it were me I would just drop her a note and tell her that if you offended her in anyway you apologize. Take the opportunity to let her know how you feel and wish her the best. If she is a true friend she will respond, if not you tried.
The end.
- 1 decade ago
Just apologise and ask if you could re-kindle the friendship start afresh,yknw you can be 2 friends who contact each other every now and then not consistently just when you can & vice versa (email her and ask her if she'd like to meet you for a cuppa @ cafe somewhere your both familiar with and meet there for a catch up) and if she doesnt want 2 b friends anymore well then she wasnt a friend 2 begin with
- 1 decade ago
Obviously you're not really friends, otherwise you would talk on the phone, etc.
Why are you upset? You didn't expect to see her and you moved away two years ago. If you were friends as kids, you've grown up and apart.
Let your family be friends, stay out of it and be cordial and polite if you see the daughter on a trip home.
To me, it sounds more like the kids who get thrown together because their parents are friends, neighbors, third cousins twice-removed, or whatever.
I wouldn't think twice about it.
- How do you think about the answers? You can sign in to vote the answer.
- 1 decade ago
You really don't want that friend to leave your life by the way you described it and feeling guilty. Specially if she has been a friend for 30 years.
Yes you would feel embarrassed and kinda stupid when meeting her again , but isn't there that tiny part of you that yes wants everything to be fine again and the water runs back to the rivers?
- Anonymous1 decade ago
Remember to send birthday cards and the next time you are home and it is convenient to go see her do so. Do not officially end your friendship, just play by her rules. Which will be actually easier than yours.
