What to do when my 18 year old son leaves home?

It's a tough situation because you are risking alienating him which could land him in trouble. On the other hand, he sounds like he is very angry/confused/stressed and I think you need to give him some time to cool off and think about where his life is heading. Be strict but firm and patient. The time will come when he realizes that you want the best for him. Sometimes it takes getting out into the world to truly understand life. My fiance was kicked out when he was 18 for being a punk teen. Now, he has a great relationship with his parents, is a college grad, and has a great job. He says that they did the right thing. Just give him a few more days and if he doesn't come to you by then, go have a talk with him and explain your concerns. Be firm but gentle. Either he chooses to work part time and attend college part time (at home), attends college full time (at home), or (if you wish) work full time and get his own place. Good luck and let us know how it goes!

My sons are now 24 & 26 and went through that same thing. If he is ok, then let him stick it out. He will come back.

As far as college is concerned, try a community college part time and let him work part time as well. That way, he can find out if college is the way he wants to go. Not for everyone.

Another option - Mom probably will not like this either is to go into the Air National Guard in your state (Not Army Guard). This will allow him to go away and grow up some. He will earn a paycheck while he is gone and attend training classes for the field that he picks. Most state Air & Army Guard units give you a tuition to a state school on top of the GI Bill that he would qualify for as well as recuitment bonuses for joining.

I actually think the parenting got harder at 14+ than before. Makes me wonder all the time how my parents did it with 6 kids.

Good Luck

Talk with him and tell him he needs to stay in college, if he wasn't living at home last semester, offer for him to come home, and if he was living there before, have him stay there, I realize he's an adult but enforce stricter study habbits, and help him to get the good grades. Explain to him how hard it is to get a decent job without a college education, and how hard it is to support yourself, and one day a family without a decent job. Tell him to think about his future, not how much he doesn't like school, and how fortunate he is to actually be able to get an education, and a college one at that.

If he's not making enough money to support himself then he can last over there only so long before he's considered freeloading and asked to leave....I'd tough it out and let him come home....chase after him and you'll be playing into his attempt to manipulate...he won't last long over there. Good Luck.

First of all, tell him what you think is best for him, such as college and a full time Job and so forth. but please never push this issue. it is really his decision to make, let him stay around for a while and play games and such. some need as I see. as a little vacation from the worry of what to do. but too, in this time, he will come to think more about these things. and then decide. but please never tell him what he should do, just point out what you feel he should do. he sees this as his future, so he wants to decide for himself. give him space, let him have time.

For telling him will only get him one way, that would be angry. this can even cause him to move out to a friends house or anywhere. just talk to him, and explain, that his life is his decision, and you will be behind what ever he decides. but what ever he decides to do, to do it and do not keep putting this off. for he has his future to look forward too.

You may see him as not being grown up. but be is now an adult, and should be treated as so. this is something else that is bothering him. he feels he is being treated as a child.

the best thing I can see to do. is to set down with him and talk. no arguments or bad words. just explain to him that you, are not trying to tell him how to run his life. it is just that, you have been where he is now, and know what he will have to face in his future. but that it is his decision to make. for all you can do is try and help him get started. the rest is up to him. tell him you will, respect his decision, what ever it is.

The reason, I tell you this, is because I have went threw this with our son. he is now 24 years old and a Sargent in the Army. but he did the same thing. as for the video games and staying up all night every night and sleeping most of the days.

we did not like what he was doing. but he told us, he felt as if he deserved some time to relax and take it easy after finishing school. so we let him have his time. soon, he was up and ready to start collage, he had everything planed out. the only problem is after starting collage. the 911 happen. he then quit collage and joined the army. we did not like this, but he felt it was what he should do.

you are the same as I, you do not, or do not want too, see him as an adult. but that is what he is now. and he has his own life to work out. even if it is not what we want for them. that does not matter. for it is what he wants. that matters to him. I know it is hard, but we have to face the fact. he is on his own now. this is also one of the worst pain, for parents to face, is let them go. but they are now, adults. so please treat them as adults. sure, they will make mistakes, but that is how they learn responsibility.