I don't want kids, but my parents will bug me about it.?

Well, I've been married for 4 years, my husband and I are both both 25, and I used to have the same problem with my mom. I'd mention how we had decided to not have kids, and she'd just say, "You're young, you'll change your mind." Well, last year, I had a breast reduction. When the subject came up again, and the "you're young" comment also, I just replied, "Do you really think I'd go through all the trouble, pain, and suffering of having a breast reduction just to go and have a baby that would ruin it?" That was the first time I actually saw her hear me. She had this look on her face (a mix of dissapointment, shock, and clarity) that told me she finally believed me and understood I was serious. Honestly though, after a few weeks, she didn't care anymore.

Cut to a couple of months ago, I actually went ahead and had my tubes tied (not telling you to do it, just saying I did). She finally told me that she was ok, and she just wants me to be happy, and she can see that I am.

If I were you, my bigger concern would be getting them to BELIEVE you. Doesn't matter if you flat out tell them, "I hate kids, if I ever got stuck with one I'd drown it in a bath tub!" They will just laugh and say, "Oh, you're young, you'll change your mind." I can't tell you how to spare their feelings if i can't even tell you how to make them belive you. Good luck though, I feel your pain.

By the way, my husband has yet to inform his parents of our decision to not have kids. They are going to be REALLY mad.

You must live your life for you! I am 28 with two kids and they are the best thing I ever done! However ,my cousin is 28 with no kids and no desire for them at all! Everyone thought she would change her mind and despite her parents nagging she hasnt, she is a great person and makes a great Aunty to my two, but if she had kids they would be unwanted kids and I think to have a baby you just dont want is Child abuse! The child will know you dont want it, and you will know you didnt want it. I would tell your parents straight that you have discussed kids and at this point in time you dont see yourself having any, they should respect your decision! They may be a little upset but they will get over it!

Good luck and stand firm!

I was married for 7 years before I had my first, and I think it was the best decision as we went abroad and enjoyed our first few years with no ties or commitment to anyone, maybe you could say that you want to enjoy life together first, and point out that at 25 you have at least 15 years to think it over some more. I wouldnt give them false hope tho.

Girl don't even sweat it I don't want children either and I'm 25. My other 1/2 is 25 too. At least you recognize you don't want them and don't start poppin them out lol.

The way I see it for myself is, I don't have any desire to have a child. If i never change a diaper, sing a song, or wipe boogies I won't miss it. Now, I'm only 25, I never know my mind can change in the years to come.

Just let your parents talk all the want. They probably won't stop the issue. I know it's annoying but just point out what I said, at least you recognize it now and you don't have a child.

I don't really like kids either lol. They kind of frighten me. Anyhow, I'm sure you've said all you can say. Maybe give them false hope if you just want them to stop and not hurt their feelings lol. Be like "maybe one day mom but not now, I just got married, let us have some time as a new married couple before we have children".

if you work and have insurance. start out with getting an IUD installed. if possible and you are sure that you dont' want to have children, begin searching for a doctor that will perform a tubal or essure on you. you may be met with some resistance (because you are under the age of 30) but you need to have your facts straight and have unwavering conviction that you will not be having any children at all. that you understand that you will never have children. once you have these procedures done, then you can tell them that you are not going to have any children, ever, and that you have the medical procedure to prove it. check out the website below, you may be able to find a doctor that maybe willing to perform it on someone under the age of 30. what you also may want to do is to keep your reproductive choices to yourself and your husband. DON'T TELL ANYONE. not family, not friends, not eve your pet. keep it to yourself, including the plans to get fixed. you don't want anyone trying to do what the can to stop you from exercising your right to chose. and good for you for makiing an educated choice about your life. good for you.

i'm 34 and i made my decision to be childfree around the age of 10. my parents and family members did not believe me then so i kept it to myself. around the age of 31 i decided to get a tubal ligation. the following year i got an endometrial ablation (due to complications with my uterus). i'm glad that i made the decision to do so. now when i am asked the question of if i'm having any children, i have no problem telling them no and the reasons why. it pretty much stops the bingo-s in their tracks. but please...check out the website below.

This is 100% your decision to make. You will know when the time is ready. Sounds like you know what you want. If they want the pitterpatter of little feet around the house get them a puppy!

They will still bug you!

Explain to them that you are not ready for that responsability at this time in your life and that badgering you won't help matters.

Sit down with them and ask them if you think that a married couple should have kids when they are ready for them. Then tell them that neither one of you feel ready. Tell them that it is not about money or careers (if that is true). Tell them that you understand they have their feelings, but you are not going to have kids soon. Also explain that if they pressure you and make you uncomfortable, that it will make visits and holidays unwelcome events and you might have to not attend to take a breather. Ask them to please have respect for you by not pressuring you. Pressure just makes you feel like they think they still have control of yourlife.

If your parents won't stop bugging you, you have to sit them down and have a conversation with them. Tell them how you feel, and let them know that's the end of it. They're not going to guilt you or pester you into having kids, and if they want to have a relationship with you, they are going to have to accept that and MOVE ON.

Tell them the truth, no harm in that. Kids aren't for everyone and it is good your guy and you are on the same page. Tell your parents you know they want to be grandparents etc and that you don't want to dissapoint them BUT...

Thats your decision you need to sit them down n just tell them how you feel [inform them why you dont want kids at the moment you have to make them understand your propostiion and if they dont understand thats on them i know u love them but your choices are up 2 you

I think you should definately wait for the right time, maybe one day you will get a mother instinct and may want to have one, thats something that happens naturally you can't force it. In the mean time let your parents know that maybe they should adopt a child until youre ready.