I have a two fold question about christian courtships see below?

Take it from someone who did not do it the way God intended - You will never have the baggage of past relationships rearing it's ugly head into your bed chamber. You have not defiled your bed and you are one (Your Husband and yourself) as God had intended it to be....Just pray that whatever feelings you have (if they are hateful or remorseful) that they leave you.....If I could turn back the clock, I would have done it the way you did.....

I've read McCain's positions on issues, and from what I can tell, he is not pro abortion, nor does he oppose the Sanctity of Marriage Act. The issue of stem cell research is rapidly becoming moot, as researchers are discovering sources for stem cells that are not human embryos. I am a Christian and though I disagree with you on many points politically, that is not relevant to the question you posed. I would say that if you feel that a particular candidate is amoral, you should not vote for him or her. I have voted for third parties in the past, including in the last election. I think George Bush is evil, but Kerry didn't really do it for me either, so I went with the Green Party. Didn't matter, really, since in New York state the Democrat is a lock for the elctoral college.

Waiting until marriage is a purity and sin issue and it doesn't guarantee a fulfilling sex life. Like most things, it takes practice, learning what works and what doesn't and negotiating. Waiting does however save us from incredible pain and suffering. And it's what God commands us to do. He also commands us to have a lot of sex on a regular basis once we are married. :)

Love and Respect - a lack thereof - in the relationship are usually the core problems but they show up in areas like sex, money, kids, in-laws, etc. Those issues are the symptoms, lack of love and respect are usually the causes. Usually. Some great books you may wanna check out are:

Boundaries by Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend

Boundaries in Marriage by Cloud and Townsend

Safe People by Cloud and Townsend

Love and Respect by Emmerson Eggrichs

Also Emmerson's conference on Love and Respect is incredibly insightful and life changing for many relationships.

It sounds like you have some very unrelated questions. I suggest you separate out the premarital questions and deal with marital ones now. It sounds like you did the right thing before marriage so just do the right thing(s) now. You should share with each other and look to each other first. If your family(ies) are getting too much involved then they have too much information. Think about what things sets them off to give advice and otherwise meddle and simply both of you keep that information from them. Any family should understand that somethings are for the husband and wife to determine on their own. That said, make sure you are seeking God, reading His Word, being humble before Him, and praying about accept God's advice.

Some of us are lucky, some are not. My parents never got involved in our life. My mother in law did, but she was just mean to her daughter. It didn't affect our relationship with each other. I have seen very few marriages where the in laws were medlers.

It really won't matter in 5-10 years when yo get a divorce, if it takes that long.

Been there.

my dear you have missed the whole point....the point is

that perfect gift you give to your spouse on your wedding

night that no one else can ever have..and once given

cannot be taken back.

it also shows sense of worth, care, and the ability to control

oneself in any situation. I.E if you can control yourself with

the one you love(fiance) you can control yourself in any other

situation that might come up in the future...true fidelity....

It varies so much. Gen 24:67 seems to say that sex is marriage. I believe one would be better off to leave the state out of it, and probably the apostate church also. The "church" is the Babylon we are supposed to come out of, and we are to render to YAHOSHUA the things that are His, and marriage seems to be one of them.

Im sorry you didnt exprience what you thought sex would be like but know that you have done the right thing if you had sex before marrige you would have commited fornication. when you commit that sing god cannot be with you he can not talk to you cause your not pure. to improve your sex life comunicate tell each other what you like what you dont like. if that doesnt work read books go to sex therapy.

The biblical purpose of sex is multifaceted. God has given sex to us as a means of glorifying Him as we fulfill its design for procreation, intimacy, comfort, and physical pleasure. It is a fulfillment of God's created order in marriage between a husband and wife.

Procreation

Gen. 1:28, "And God blessed them; and God said to them, 'Be fruitful and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it; and rule over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the sky, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.'"

Intimacy

Song 1:13, "My beloved is to me a pouch of myrrh which lies all night between my breasts."

Song 2:3, "Like an apple tree among the trees of the forest, so is my beloved among the young men. In his shade I took great delight and sat down, and his fruit was sweet to my taste."

Song 2:6, "Let his left hand be under my head and his right hand embrace me.”

Song 4:5, "Your two breasts are like two fawns, twins of a gazelle, which feed among the lilies."

Companionship

Song 3:1, “On my bed night after night I sought him whom my soul loves..."

Physical Pleasure

Song 1:2, "May he kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine."

The sexual relation is only properly expressed in marriage between a husband and wife (1 Cor. 7:2-3). Any sexual contact between unmarried people is sinful since it violates God's design.

Sex is a wonderful blessing given to us by the Lord that serves to express intimacy to another. Some theologians believe that the sexual union is representative of the intimacy found in the Trinity. This is not to say that the members of the Godhead, the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, have sexual relations. That is absurd. But there is an incredible intimacy and communion between them. The three persons in the Godhead are, after all, one God. This is why Jesus said that He and the Father were one (John 10:30). Remember, God says when a man and woman get married, they become one flesh (Gen. 2:24). This expression of physical union which has a spiritual aspect to it ("the two become one flesh") and is why some theologians see the sexual relation as a sacred experience.

We don't know if such speculations are accurate, but sexuality is to remain pure nonetheless. This means that the marriage bed must not violate the commandments of God in deed or thought -- no adultery, no pornography, no voyeurism, no bestiality, incest, etc. The sexual union is God ordained and God given and must be experienced in a godly way within marriage. In this, the sexual union can bring glory to God as it is experienced in fulfillment of God's design and purpose to provide pleasure, companionship, intimacy, and a means of fulfilling the command of God to fill the earth.

So the purpose of sex is to glorify God, bring forth children, express intimacy, provide comfort, and bless the spouse.

2. Forgivness is one of the hardest thing to do. we cant do it on our own but know it must be done god says if u cant forgive he wont forgive u infront of his father. if god could forgive us sinners and send his only son we can for give anybody with gods help ofcourse. just pray to get he will remove it. the devil uses animosity to hold on to us so let it go. its hard but leave it to god