Getting over a loss.....?

No, nothing wrong with you. I lost a horse (beautiful black colt just 2 years old) when I was a senior in high school and it devastated me. I am 13 years older now, and moved away, but we went back to the old home place after we were married (my parents had sold the Nebraska ranch when I was in college, and now ranch in Idaho) just to show my husband where I grew up. I couldn't step into that barn without looking at that certain place where he had laid (he broke a leg in a fight with a board fence--he was super wild when I bought him, and I never got the chance to gentle him).

The day he was to be put down, I said goodbye and I promised him I would never forget him. I had so many plans and dreams wrapped up in that colt, and it broke my heart that such an innocent beautiful horse had to be put down.

I wrote a lot of poems about him. You can view them here, if you like: http://www.freewebs.com/daisykj/myhorsepoetry.htm (no copying or using my poems without written permission from me--these are copyrighted!)

I wish you the best, and hope you do go riding again. Your heart won't heal, but would you really want it to? I treasure even my saddest thoughts about my colt, because it makes the memories come back, and I don't want to lose them. Loss like this is bittersweet, and it's okay to feel it. Just don't let it prevent you from continuing to build dreams for the future and have interest in other horses and what they can teach you. You may never bond with another one, but you can still enjoy them, and chances are you will love again.

I lost my beloved, once in a life time, never have another one like him gelding on Nov 18, 2000. I'll never "get over" him. So, do I think there's something wrong with you?? No. But just because you miss your horse, doesn't mean that there's not another one out there that you could enjoy. I still enjoy riding, and I like the two I'm riding now pretty well. They're not my Ghost, but I can still appreciate them for the individuals they are. I hope that you can find another horse to enjoy.

Every horse I've lost (and there have been a few) are painful to remember to this day. Obviously I moved on to the next and the next after that.

You've no need to feel disloyal or guilty about taking that first step. Grieve for your horse, tears are healing but move on you must. The horsemans' adage, Been thrown? Get right back on.

The first step is the hardest, but the journey of a thousand miles begins with that first step.

(I'm still crying over Wind Chill (May 28,'07- Feb 29 '08) the starved little colt that was frozen to the ground ) =...(

I'm sorry!!!! there is nothing wrong with you, your just sad, although you will never stop loving or caring for your horse you will get over it with time!! maby it would help if you got another horse some day.

I hope you have the courage to go riding again!

ps i have a horse to if i had to put her down i would proably feel like that to!

No dont feel bad! Putting a horse down is a very hard thing and you probably loved your horse a lot! Dont feel bad at all! I am really sorry for you and I know how you feel. This horse wasn't mine but I loved him, he was my friends, and something went wrong with his foot and they had to put him down and everyone was really sad. So dont feel bad and just try to be happy!!!

Good luck and dont let this ruin your love of horses!

Don't mourn for me

Dear owner, kinda and true.

I know that you will miss me

As I will also think of you.

We shared so many secrets;

those you whispered in my ear.

I've kept those secrets for you

lest any one would hear.

And in return you've kept me

from being turned out in the cold.

You've fed, watered, and cared for me

while we both grew old.

But God had called and needs me;

He says that it is time

I claim that sweet reward

in a kinder, greener clime.

He primises sweeter clover,

clear water, rich and pure

I'll never have to suffer

from wounds that humans cannot cure.

I'll romp and play all day

with others he has called hither

I'll have so many new friends

that will scratch upon my wither.

I'll be watching out for you

when comes your judgement day

and together towards the pearly gates

we again will ride away!

-author unknown

There is nothing wrong with you. It's ok to look for your horse. Eventually you will come to acceptance that he is gone but he will always hold a special place in your heart. I say go back to riding if that is what you want to do!!

No, theres nothing wrong with you. i cant tell you how many times i do the same thing. Its like if something happens to your family, a big tornado occurs, or something where something devistating has happened.. you always try to remember the good times, or bring the good things back and then it just gets you upset even more. Your going to feel sad, you may even cry but im sure going back will be a good thing.

we all do it.. when my little horse sunny died as a kid i looked for her every morning thinking she was still alive.. but eventually after going back to our barn enough times i got over it. Its sad but you just gotta push through and know hes in a better place now. Hes looking down on you... and im sure he wouldnt want you to get upset over him.

Im sorry - good luck with your trip. I hope you will be able to stick it through.

Going to the barn and seeing all the familiar things you associate with your horse is going to trigger a flood of bittersweet memories and feelings.

This just means you're normal. (Hate it for you)

I've suffered some significant losses in my life. The thing that works for me is that I simply refuse to allow my losses to be the defining factor in my life. Beloved pets and people die, and that's just an unpleasant reality. I have a firm belief that this life is not "all there is" and I will see my beloveds again. But while I'm here, I want to live a full, happy life, and I won't let my losses stop me. If they were here, they'd want me not to just go on, but to go on joyfully and with earnest.

Go back to the barn and go for a ride. Bring your kleenex and don't be embarrassed to be emotional.

There is nothing wrong with your reaction to your horse's death...It can take some time for many people to recover from a loss of a very special friend who was so near and dear to them.

Know that your horse is not "gone"..he/she lives on in the wonderful memories that you have of that special horse.

http://rainbowsbridge.com/Poem.htm

http://www.indigo.org/rainbow/

http://freespace.virgin.net/david.brunton/I%20Did%...

These links will offer some comfort for you and you will know that others are grieving too from the loss of a very special friend.

God bless.